Loving Day: what It Means to Me

Dear readers,

Imagine you couldn’t marry the person you loved because the person you loved was a different skin color. That was the reality of the Lovings, Mildred and Richard. About yesterday, it was Loving Day, a day that celebrates something Richard and Mildred dared to do. They were each raised in a very inclusive community. Mildred was one color, Richard the other. but it didn’t matter to Mildred’s brother Otha. Otha was the one who set Mildred up with Richard, they’d been friends in school. Isn’t that how it all works? they secretly married because of a last vestige of segregation in their home state, and it was horrible. They were affected by racial purity and what they call antimiscegenation laws that prohibited interracial marriage. This couple went above the heads of the authorities, pursued justice for each other and their children, and they ultimately won the fight for all interracial couples such as myself and Trenton.

what does Loving Day have to do with me as a person? Personally, I find black people are the strongest and best examples of really resourceful people on the planet. I’m ashamed to say that white people try every day to steal the inventiveness away from black folk. Let’s say that the blacks invented a lot of things, including traffic lights, ice cream, a refrigerator, if I’m not mistaken. Black people find ways to make stuff work, but white people just sit around and say they’re smarter when all they seem to be able to do in history is plunder, stalk, and conquer, moreover kill everybody and sit there and make everybody bow down to them, and subjugate. It’s a pattern much like the Elvenbane’s elves. Thanks, Mercedes Lackey.

Why did I just write this though? Trenton is a resourceful sort, just like half the human race. Now I’m not saying all black men are the same way, but the air I get from the black men and women and others alike is that they’re highly intelligent, and no, not servile at all. I can’t stand it when someone says a black man is a servant, a black woman should work as a maid, etc etc. That makes me wanna vomit, because my mother in law is no hotel maid, she worked for years doing computer work. Now that’s brilliant. There is so much untapped talent in both the blind and black communities, but I digress.

As a woman who is ashamed to have been raised in a whitewashed piece of crap family, I don’t even want to entertain the idea of having to put on that Martha apron and cook for some evil or rather dastardly white guy. My mom would slave away at the kitchen every day, my dad would watch football. He rarely cooked, except for a goddamn single dish and it was usually either that or grilled somethings. typical simtcom family you might think, but my birthday was usually too small, life wasn’t affirmed much after the age of twenty, and even when I passed the age of 21 I did not get much, even if I did, it was too small. I never had friends except for the extreme evangelical idiots that populated Titusville, mostly white people, and here I was thinking about marrying a black man. I refuse to put on that stupid Martha apron and go to work in the kitchen, and moreover, it would dishonor all I fought for if I was popping out more than five kids. Ugh. Some evangelical christians in Titusville have this propensity to have too many kids, whether one or three or even six. The biggest family I know is a religious fundamentalist family we all know, and their eldest son Josh committed some dire crimes. He’s white.

So if Loving hadn’t been handed down, I would have been lonely. Trenton is black, and a justice of the Supreme Court would have made hateful statements about blacks, but that wasn’t the case. Honestly, I love Trenton to death. He has his imperfections like everybody else. In two days, we will celebrate Juneteenth, and we’ll have a drum duet, duh. Juneteenth celebrates the end of slavery, and I can tell you slavery would have affected all of us, not just blacks and whites. I’m sorry, but if anyone believes in slavery, that is the wrongest thing in the world. there are still slaves in the world, although not the american slaves, not sanctioned at least. If you take a trip through Atlanta Airport, you’l probably see slaves being shipped and transported, and you won’t even notice. Human trafficking as they now call it is so rampant in poorer communities, and we need to know what causes it. More to come.

Beth

Letter to my ex boyfriend and others, TW ableism and sexual harassment/fragile masculinity mentioned here

The following piece is dedicated to Blake Tucker, with whom I spent 2 and a half years as a girlfriend, but I’d also like to give a shout out to Jessie, my messy and altogether very good friend from Miami, and thank him for letting me open my eyes. This piece should probably be in the feminist essay collections, and I was inspired to write this because of activists like Jessica Valenti and more importantly, there’s a Muskogee lady that wrote this brilliant essay on how women have been protecting each other in Native American circles. If anyone thinks I weaponized or did something wrong, please read below and feel free to be constructive, positive, and above all, careful what you tell me.

Dear Blake,

Last week was hell. And I couldn’t believe what you did to yourself. I’m not here to discuss a vibrator, sexual freedom, or God. I’m here to discuss you, and how you contributed to a very big problem here in America, got duped by Christians who are telling you that women like me don’t deserve to be heard, and you silently watch me get bitten up by bugs, attacked by heathen Ableists with no logic whatsoever about thee disabled experience on my end, and you don’t even connect with your Native American self. Like it or not, I think I need to tell yoou my story again and for the rest of the people reading this, especially activists, feminists, and others who are interested, I’ll explain where each of us has been.

the whole thing about vibrators is. just plain misunderstanding. Blake, you said to me shortly before we broke up something that absolutely was an affront to me being destressed in a time when stress was everywhere. I won’t write it here, you’ll only get mad at me and such. Blake, I care enough about you as a friend to say you should still go to your church, but I want to present a picture of God you never even drew, saw, or might not think exists.

Jesus, the Christ you report to for missions and so on, was an inclusive figure. Jesus was, however, used to mess up Native cultures to the point of death and nonexistence. The Spanish, particularly those in New Mexico and Arizona, used Jesus as a way to convert what they saw as “heathens.” But it has harmful consequences still today. In the ancient times, if you rolled with Jesus and the rich Eurocentric stuff, you got treated better. Is that fair? Jesus would never have said, kill the ones who don’t convert. I see a parallel between the 1500 to 1700 missions in the sixteenth through the eighteenth centuries and Muhammad the prophet’s weird and deadly fatwa, religious order, to “fight and slay the pagans where ye find them.” Muslims today have this issue with holy war, and among their so called missions is to convert everybody or make them pay with the tax or their lives. It has some rash consequences, including the genocide of the Coptic Christians, and the Jewish people have to contend with the power they are misusing. There’s a tribe in Iraq and Syria called the Yezidi that we have touched on, and because IS, or Islamic State, wants to make the whole world Muslim, you got Yezidi people dying or fighting. Nadia Murad, if you read this, I hope you see the same pattern I am about to describe below.

Blake, when the peoples you represent, all of these peoples, saw the Spanish and the pale faced white humans trashing their beliefs, going after the Native women, the men had little power to do with it. Do you know why the Trail of Tears happened? Because of a white idiot named Andrew Jackson, and the history books don’t tell you enough about it, only to whitewash it. Native beliefs were to be eradicated along with they themselves. There’s something about Natives I am drawn to, and let me explain what it is.

Muskogee activist Sarah Deer writes of a method of protecting women, an ancient survivor network and it whispers too. Deer says that “gossip is an English word” in her essay with the same words as its title. She says that women in the Indian country or first nations people would whisper that a man is dangerous, do things to protect each other, etc etc. Men would get axed not by death or killing, but there’s a whole healing process that goes with the whisper network. Would my white women friends like to try it out? I certainly want to, but Blake, here’s the deal: the tribes affirm women, LGBTQI+ and blind and deaf people. In ancient times, the Native tribes of the West, particularly tribes such as the Hopi and the Navajo, would integrate their deaf and they’d never, never seek to cure blindness. Sure, some babies lived and died as babies but it was never a shameful thing, and there was lots. of medicine to be had in the spiritual ceremony and traditions. There’s even a legend of the Cherokee tribes that affirms women’s power to give life as a weapon of sorts. When a woman in some tribes has her moon time, her menstruation, she would be allowed to go to this sweat lodge thing where she can recuperate and such, and she rests and stretches out the cramps from Hell. But imagine for a moment that this same feeling a woman has could be used to save a race of people. It did in this legend, called Stonecoat, where a stone guy tries to rob the people, kill them, etc., but seven “granddaughters” weaken him in a big show of badassery where they say, “I’m in the sacred way” each time he walks by. He’d try to convince the girls they’re dirty, but the badassery just threw him to the ground. It’s my favorite female legend of Native sorts. There are many others, and I can tell you that Natives had Romeo and Juliet in the legend of Mina-Sauk before we even had Shakespeare. These ancient traditions may not have anything with God or Jesus, but I can tell you this much: weaponizing Jesus as a way of dissing me is not going to work.

Native medicines and beliefs and ancient peoples did not necessarily have anything against a woman making herself feel good. I don’t see much of that, but regarding your comments to me before we broke, the vibrator was a doctor prescribed thing against what we used to call “female hysteria.” For disabled females, this is a common thing you might say back then. Today’s disabled female is likely to experience violence, I have, and isolation, which I have as well. I’m done trying to tell you that disabled women experience violence and you say, I know I know, but Blake, the thing is that America was built on an unfair and unjust patriarchal social hierarchy that has many layers to it. Here’s how it works:

You have cisgender, straight and able white males on top. Follow that with cisgender able straight females, then black straight cisgender males and females respectively, and then you have cisgender straight indigenous folks, followed by all manner of disabled people, black and white included, but then at the very bottom you have nonbinary and sexual minorities. This hierarchy is disgusting and I want it to stop. We don’t need cisgender straight males running things. Native American disabled males who don’t follow a big Evangelical megachurch or even a small one like yours are likely to face homicide, taunts from the higher up people, etc., so I know you would want to stay put in your church. Sure your friends are cool, but there’s something I’m coming up on that I’m not cool with.

It wasn’t Native women who told me you flirted too much. It was a male who, surprise surprise is a disabled Hispanic cisgender straight dude, but oh my god, we’ve been friends since who knows when. Note that I didn’t mention Hispanics in the hierarchy thing though because you have two or three different kinds, including black ones and white ones, so I just go by the black versus the white. NOt all Latinos are white and not all are black, it’s a mixed bag. This friend of mine is amazing, I call him Jessie the Messy, and he’s just plain cool. He’s got his own stuff, works and has a cool head on his shoulders. Jessie warned me about your tendencies, but I was stupid as usual and didn’t read into things because I’ve been taught not to. But sure enough, you get used by someone else, and break another’s heart. Or she broke yours, I don’t care how the relationship panned out. If any girlfriends you have know that you disrespected my beliefs as a feminist and didn’t understand why I was so deeply hurt by the people purporting to believe in Jesus, and I’ll tell that story now.

When you broke it off with me, the now former preacher at Sovereign Grace Community Church in Westminster decided to call me a whore. A whore for being with Trenton. I brought him there in an effort to solidify friendships and maybe even see how the people would react. But thankfully, years later, well, I’m glad I and Trenton haven’t gone. I have a buddy in chorus that recommended I not live in Westminster because of what she called a “scary megachurch” but there are plenty of those in Westminster. What Sovereign Grace did can still be felt today. I attend a UU church, Unitarian universalist, and have found that it’s not only Jesus that suffices for spiritual teaching and knowledge. I can’t subscribe to this notion of “sin” because it’s too flexible and it stings too broadly on a lot of subjects. Wearing a short skirt if you’re identifying as female? Sin, according to the beliefs you’ve chosen. Playing with your own hair if you’re female? Sin again. And the notion of sin is an excuse to make my life more expensive, so think about why your mom, aunts, sisters, all have to pay more for tampons. There is a luxury tax imposed because the government is sexist. The tax code for pink products, feminine stuff, is completely sexist. I only want others to understand that what you did to me represents a bigger problem with guys. Trenton tries to be supportive, and he is extremely cool, but you and anyone trying to attack me is not warranted in doing so.

Here’s what I want you to do. Stop talking to females who use you. I don’t use anyone, so stop it. IF you continue to be a flirt with girls after you’ve married, I’ll have to do what Sarah Deer does and warn her that this might not be the time to marry. I may not say your name, but still. Blake, I also recommend you reading Unladylike, a field guide to smashing the patriarchy and claiming your space. You don’t have to be female to read it, for real. Feminism is for everybody, and it benefits everybody. I do not hate men, as some will tell you, I just want accountability. You heard thee recent story of Josh Dugger, right? I was shocked and heartbroken because no man should be viewing child porn, but Trenton and I know that it’s illegal. We also know that Ashley Madison is not a good place to be if you’re trying to stay faithful. Vibrators aren’t the problem, and women aren’t the problem. Men are. Josh is highly unfaithful and abusive toward kids by viewing child porn. The victims who were used for this pornography are also being abused by Josh because in some way they might have been forced into it. Child pornography is something I know you could never see yourself doing, but if you were sighted, Blake, I wouldn’t be surprised if you went off and told someone that I didn’t look like your ideal woman, and it’s not your fault. Blake, you do have a good heart, but don’t get yourself dragged into conversations where you don’t belong. Lyn, one of the women who did the bad stuff on my community help post, has had nothing to do. She’s speaking from a class, race, and support privilege. I hate that, and data shows that minorities don’t just get subpar supports, they also get subpar commentary and subpar choices for schooling and other things. Your people are in trouble, and it’s not your fault. Why not summon the power of Wilma Mankiller to be your guide? Why not summon the ancestors to help you with some sort of realization of who you are? Jesus is great and all, but Jesus would never want you to label every woman’s desire a sin. The traditions that state that Adams are in charge and Eves are not do not apply to me and all of us anymore. I. can’t stand by and watch as women are sexually assaulted and no one believe them. The bedbug issue in this apartment complex scared my caregiver, and it scared the company, and yet the caseworker wasn’t there when she needed to be, and I don’t bllame her for it, but she needs to show up for me and do for me because I’m her client, and so should she do this for other clients. NASW clearly does put client safety in their code of ethics. I’ve written my local Senator for the state district 4, and I hope to have an appointment with her because the laws and policies that are in place are enabling Lyns everywhere to ruin lives like mine. Your friend Jennifer thinks she can get away with practically anything, and worse, both those girls spoke from a support class privilege. They had family support, I don’t have it, and they’re white, straight, etc. Lyn has a job, and she didn’t earn the employability. It’s all in the numbers, so look carefully.

Blake, please do some homework and get back to me. Jesus would demand that you apologize, and I apologize if what I said about you was hurtful, but what you did really wasn’t your fault per se. Though you chose this set of beliefs about Jesus and women, yu do have a choice to enact safer ways of interacting with the females in your life such that you don’t get ire from Jessies everywhere, or even your family’s women. Don’t subscribe to this notion that sin is everything, and it’s not sinful for a woman to read or write. Please read the Handmaid’s Tale and the Testaments, authored by Margaret Atwood, and she really has a lot of wisdom about why she wrote these books.

Beth

Overview of Inclusivity and Religion: Making Spiritual matters a Thing of Inclusion for Disabled Congregants

Dear readers,

I shared Ellen Stumbo’s post from the Mightete, a disabled news org, and she has a lot of things to probably unpack. Thank you for those who saw that story and wished to be a part of my spiritual life. I looked through this blog, and I saw some mistakes I might have made, identifying one man as Somali and another man as not. Who knows, but I want to truly open a timeline and a dialogue with all faiths and religions, notwithstanding the mistakes I made, but I want to put all the stuff I wrote prior to this post in one big summary timeline, and here it is. It includes what you should do with disabled congregants, and this is based on experiences I’ve had with churches.

1. First and foremost, your parking lot and door entrances have to be wide enough for wheelchairs, even if the building is rustic and old. Make some accommodations in your restrooms so that disabled people can use them. Place bars on the walls of each stall, and make the stalls wide enough so that a wheelchair user can use the stalls. Blind people should be able to ID the bathroom with a Braille sign. Place such signage above the door, or by the door on a wall in the alcove’s outer side. That’s how the signage can be easily seen, and I look for signs there. Also, make sure your Braille is proofread by a certified NLS Braille proofist, even if it’s the word handicapped. here’s a funny Braille story to show you why: The Braille sign for “and” is written with dots 1-2-3, then dots 4-6, all put together. it’s a letter y in Braille but written a bit backwards. So the dot combo is 1-2-3-4-6. However, there was a sign that was written with the “ing” sign: the dot 2 was missing from the “and” sign, so the sign that my cane teacher interpreted was the following: “Girls hingicapped.” Be careful with Braille contractions and lettering, and make sure you have a Braille cheat sheet on you to make sure all signage is correctly Brailled. The architecture of this building should reflect inclusivity. For Muslims, make sure the woodoo areas are completely user friendly, and if you insist on women and men being in separate prayer areas, do not use only stairs. Put the women in a place where wheelchairbound sisters can enjoy worship from the same floor as the men, but you must have wider doorways and the woodoo fountains should be at a level that is usable for those sisters who can’t raise their right or left hand to turn on the fountains. Make sure there are places to put shoes where a sister or brother won’t trip. This is something an old friend frequently would talk about while I was present at mosque. For Jewish ceremonies, always include your wheelchair using sisters and brothers, and for those who count themselves as orthodox or Hassidim, always always always have a door open for disabled congregants who want to join in. Even the goyem will admire your inclusivity.

2. When a congregant walks in, make sure you are welcoming to them. For Christian churches, please make sure you have alternatives to hymnals that a disabled person may use, and as a blind person, I wish I had been able to read the words to worship service songs in detail. Give the blind congregant access to the lyrics at worship services ahead of time, or let them hear a recording of the hymns you will be singing in services. For Jewish folks, same sort of thing may apply to shabbats, and for those who hate tech during shabbat, please note that an exception should be made for blind folks using Braille. Braille displays should be used in Hebrew services so they can follow along with the rabbi or congregation cantor, and make sure that the persons leading the choir and rabinical folks know about this stuff. Your Jewish blind congregants should have as much access to Hebrew scripture, Hebrew chorale pieces, and so much more so they can sing and follow along. Of course, young Jewish students should be included in Hebrew school as well, so for teachers of such, make sure your texts are written in appropriately hebrew Braille. it is in my opinion the best way to get a student familiar with the Hebrew language. It’s similar to Arabic, and I’ve seen Arabic Braille written down, but face it, the letters are pretty similar to both Roman and Hebrew script. For religious educators in Catholic circles, you need to consult the publishers of your books. Make sure the Catholic faith textbooks are written for children in Braille, and if you’re a teacher, beg the publisher for the teacher’s edition in the same format. If not Braille, kids and teachers who are blind should be given access to the same materials but in electronic format. If they use a pc or mac with screen readers, the formatting should be excellent, top quality, arranged so that pictures are captioned and labeled accordingly. This also applies to Muslim folks. Sadly, I wasn’t able to participate in Qur’an classes with my sisters in islam, but for the young folks in TAQI, or Tasir Al Qur’an Institute schools, they should be given Braille copies or electronic Arabic and English copies of the Qur’an. This way, as the prophet said, you can still gain knowledge, even if you can’t see it.

3. For all religious centers, babies should be baptized or blessed with the same dignity and pomp as with normal babies.

4. When a kid grows up, and with adults growing in faith, let the person experiment or teach them the science behind the choices they make with procreation. While i’m not a fan of the Catholic or Christian ideological senses of don’t have sex until marriage, please note that disabled children and adults face the most poverty because of that very thing. Disabled men become predators sometimes because they are not taught how to keep their sex organs to themselves, and disabled women get objectified. We need to create a welcoming and safe space for all, including disabled people. All religious centers and community churches should include a consent class, a code of honor and consent for all congregants and brothers and sisters. While islam has strictures of family honor tied right into the religion itself, I would encourage Muslims to research and understand the rules about consent in modern culture. islam must conform to let females make all choices, and even in cultures where this is not the case, females must be able to say no if they see something wrong or abusive about a man. This definitely includes disabled females. I left islam because I didn’t want to have to marry a stranger, and I wasn’t about to get barefoot and pregnant with someone i hardly understood how to please anyway. I would have also had superiority games played on me if I married a sighted guy, which the Muslim brothers suggested. Unfortunately, for these brothers, I married a non Muslim blind guy, and I won’t be coming back. I love my sisters, and I understand if the sisters insist I walk back, but I can’t do any such thing because islam has become a contested religion here in this country. I’ve been disrespected by a doctor who swore i was “pretending to be Arab”, and was trolled on Facebook for this very thing. I don’t subscribe to religious views that contradict my own core beliefs about me, and that should be what matters.

5. When a bride and or grooms and brides or couple comes to you and your religious center for marriage, get their story. If a couple wanting to wed is disabled, offer the commitment ceremony option first. I want to shout out to Jenny, my minister from Jefferson unitarian Church. I wanted a woman minister to lead my wedding commitment ceremony because I was not, I repeat not, going to submit to a man in everything, and I was just about done with the patriarchal … dare I say it? Bullshit. patriarchs like some of the priests that abuse women and boys should never be allowed to do weddings anyway. If a bride or groom is not supported because of financial disability, physical disability, or anything else, offer to pay for everything. St. Bernadette’s Catholic church paid for the catering of the wedding of a dear friend of mine, but the bride also had the support of her family. Since Trenton and I did not have the support of church and family, and the pandemic had ruined all churchgoing plans, jenny came by our apartment and we had no ring bearer. We also had a guy doing camera angling for the phone. I recorded my commitment ceremony on Facebook Live. It was a beautiful ceremony, and I honestly wish I had more support, but it was true to us. We had a biblical reading of course, but we also had a wisdom reading from another spiritual source, something I really wish other Christians would consider. Weddings are an important part of life as a human being, and even if the bride is incapacitated, offer the support she needs to fight back and marry the man she loves. I had no support, and now I’m having to sue my own family for damages related to the guardianship. They are very hostile if confronted, but they don’t get it. They never wanted me to legally get married, and I didn’t, but I’m still committed to Trenton and will stay that way for life. Anyway, i’m glad I did my own wedding, but with church supports and no pandemic, it could have been better.

6. Offer support for disabled adults wishing to integrate kids into the mix. Whether the family is getting started or has been started, please, please welcome disabled people’s kids. Baptize them or commit them or dedicate them as above, if they consent. In most Protestant churches, baptism must be given if faith is strong enough and if you’re eighteen. Also, scriptural abuse cannot be tolerated whether it’s committed against the parental couple or the kids themselves. For parents everywhere, disabled or not, always have an open line of communication with your kids about sex abuse and spiritual abuse. If your child is abused spiritually by a church, leave that congregation immediately.

7. If a parent with disabilities wants to know how their kid is doing in spiritual circles, they need to ask about it. Churches should be a welcome and safe space for all kids, including those with disabilities and colored folks, any stripe and color included but not limited to black, brown, polka dots, purple, etc.

8. If the parent of a disabled congregant in your church dies, be with the person and show them the grieving process. Give them bereavement resources in your spiritual center, and let them come to you for guidance. As a minister or cleric in your spiritual center, you should be a good ear to bounce off all the stuff the child or young adult is facing in the death of their loved one. If the disabled adult is facing terminal conditions related to their disability, give them the hospice resources they deserve. Give them a good sendoff whether they are nonbinary or otherwise. Islam insists on strict gender conformity, but to those who practice Native beliefs, the two spirit people should be honored above all else. For those who are nonbinary who were shunned from communities for being nonbinary or LGBTQ+, please note that there are people who won’t condemn you to hell, so if you’re on the heaven bound train, find the right person for your funerary care. It will be worth your while.

9. Never put any sort of discipline in place that would disfavor disabled adults who are living in houses outside marital status with someone of the opposite sex. Trenton and I were abused and frequently targets of sin related comments from my former church. I feel that all churches should discipline anyone who abuses a disabled woman and calls her a whore, not blame her for being a whore at all. Churches must if anything have a discipline system in place to keep predators from working with youngsters, but above all, they should never define marriage as between a man and a woman who is able. Ableist marriage practices in churches make marriage difficult, along with those financial penalties from SSI. Please beware the issues we disabled people face.

10. Never tell someone they can’t come back because of their disability, and don’t make them confess sins they didn’t commit. I can’t fess up to sins, I didn’t commit the sins of being sexually abused. that’s not a sin. A sin is what my exes have done. Not my living with Trenton, not my commitment to him either.

Thank you all for reading this, and I hope you enjoy the blog further.

Beth

letter to the white people who call 911 or disturb the lives of black Americans

Dear white people,

Yes, this is a post dedicated to white people, especially those who think it okay to disturb the lives of African Americans and those with disabilities, and those without disabilities alike. I have a quandary for you to think on: blindfold yourselves. Underneath that blindfold, how do you feel? How does it feel to walk about blindfolded? Now, I want you to grab someone in the room, black or white, whatever. Don’t look at their faces, don’t stare at the curl in their hair. Don’t make fun of how they talk, walk, blink, or run a temp. Just go, grab that person in front of you and go sit down and talk to these people. What will you find out? The answers might surprise you.

You might find that black people’s lives are rooted in suffering and tyranny caused not by a problem in their nature, but by your very existence, presence, and interactions with them. They do not like what you say about them, calling them unpleasant names too vulgar to write in this blog, they do not like the way you shackle them to the walls while speaking to them. They don’t like the illegalization of natural medicine, including cannabis, and they don’t like so many of the other things you do to them to make their lives a living hell. Imagine if you had seen a sign on a black owned business that said, “Negroes/blacks only” and you walked in and said “I want service.” The black man behind the counter gets up, says, “No way, you paleface, get the hell out of my restaurant.” If you don’t, you get arrested. Imagine sitting in the bus while on the way to work, but imagine that you have to sit in the back, in a dirty seat covered with holes and crumby looking. then another black person steps in, and you are told to “Give up that seat.” You refuse, and get arrested for this. So you did this to black people, so don’t be surprised if the blacks try and upend your system, your little privileged system of white power and such. The Brethren of men who every day set foot in your jails, your prisons, your mental health crisis units, these men and women alike, these young children, they are God’s chosen people, they are his children. You have upended their empires, kingdoms, and matrilineal way of life, and replaced it with chattel slavery because you are of the opinion that these people lack the knack for inventions, and you steal the credit for these people’s work. Who really invented ice cream? Someone who’s black. Who truly invented the cotton gin? Don’t give that crap about Eli Whitney, so tell me who really invented the cotton gin? Don’t tell me cotton is king in the South, and don’t spew your nonsense about Gone with the Wind being better than a modern Korean movie, though I can’t speak Korean myself. Don’t bring your guns to protests, remember you are the seventeen-year-old who shoots protesters for fun, right? Wrongo. You should never have had that gun and you knew it was wrong, don’t claim self defense. I don’t defend a murderer. You don’t understand that what these people want is to end your oppression, your silencing, your stupid and abominable Jim and Jane Crow. They need to go, and we’re in a serious situation with Jim Crow 2.0. Jim Crow 2.0 consists of the following: police brutality, mass incarceration, and racial profiling. It’s not like it’s the law that you idiots get all the power and privilege because you sit in cleaner diner booths, go to the lavatories in cleaner areas, sit in the “whites only” waiting rooms. It’s not Jim Crow laws, not now at least. But Jim Crow version 2’s time is up. Stop killing my brothers, sisters, relatives, married relations, partner, sons and daughters, all who are darker than yourself. Stop killing and oppressing these people. Leave my Trenton alone, and let his people go. Don’t start with me, I’ll tear down the walls around your real intent, to sabotage my relationship with him, with Trenton, the only man who has shown me affection and love, who you probably don’t want around. His mother is a real mama bear, someone who would sacrifice life and limb to protect her son, and I get it. I’m in her family, and there’s no one better than her for Trenton. She nurtured his gifts, she understood her son’s disability. You white people have a lot to learn from a simple act of compassion, so where the hell is your empathy? If you have a fragile ego, go throw it in the dumpster. Just do it, don’t complain, don’t whine or scream at me. If you do, then I’ll give you a fragile ego to complain about, a broken and deflated one, more deflated than a deflated football. It will be the main thing that keeps you out of college, jobs, housing, and so on. Your egos will likely crash and burn, and you think you can live in a bubble forever. Listen to the words of Eiffel 65’s Living In a Bubble for a moment: “Life in a bubble, baby, a bubble’s no reality. If it blows, you’ll be alone.” If that little alternate reality bubble pops, you will be scattered like the drops of bubblegum saliva that goes flying everywhere when you pop a bubble of gum. Don’t tell me I don’t know. I popped some gum before, and blew a pretty large bubble, but when the bubble bursts, it goes flat, and in the case of the gum, it goes everywhere, all over your face. Look at Jimmy Neutron, who tried “bubble transport” to get to school, but the bubble burst on a tree, and where Jimmy went, well, he ended up with gum all over himself. He was alone. His reality had burst.

A bubble of reality for you white people is in your history books, so if you want to make a more equitable society, get rid of your whitewashed bullshit. Just do it. Don’t whine, don’t scream, don’t kick, don’t fly into rages and threaten me. If you do, I’ll pop that gum all over your face should there be that bubble around you. IF you get covered in that alternate gunk of bubblegum, don’t even ask for help. Because in reality, the people you are hurting are going to burst that bubble for you. Your textbooks, for one, will be changed to talk about the self made black people you demolished in Tulsa, Oklahoma in a race massacre, not a riot. You also massacred many a young unarmed black man in the streets, even men who I honestly don’t understand why they’d take advantage of me. Forgive these men, for they do not know what they do. Lord, forgive them.

So what would my world be without my partner? Alone, isolated, my care halved, my life cut in half, and only half of me alive. And you will be to blame. If you’re the officers who swear you want to “protect and serve”, then by golly do it, goddamnit. Protect and serve all your people in your precincts, don’t just favor the pretty white blonde cheerleader with the annoying ponytail, the valley girl accent, and the stupid amounts of makeup on her. Don’t favor the strapping young brunette man, brown hair lighter than wood, eyes bluer than water, with the tattoos on his arms, with the big muscles. Don’t favor the annoying old white lady with the spoiled rotten puppy in her purse, her long silver hair tattered about with split ends that haven’t been cut, but yet is stick straight. Don’t favor the goldilocks child in your classrooms, her curly blonde locks could also be brown, who sits there and makes up stories about her baby dolls and shows disfavor to everything else. IF you’re a teacher, give the young dark haired boy with the dreadlocks some extra TLC, okay? Don’t sit there and call the young Kenyan immigrant sitting beside your other black students a freak or other racist language too vulgar to write here. Teach the children how to sing, “Jambo” in Swahili, how to play the djembe drums and dance like they never danced before. Allow your white brethren to learn about these cultures, and give them the highest standards by which to accomplish the understanding and empathy toward this boy.

Don’t disfavor the young dark haired girl, the one with the so called “Ramen noodle hair”, the one who gets bullied all the time, but give her a friend and a hand to hold. If she wants to go to your gleaming universities covered with gold thrones and classrooms inlaid with silver, let her in. Let her in, and if you’re the popular girl in the high school who is spending all her time fucking around with boys on the jock side of the cafeteria, take a moment and take care not to do it anymore. If you are that girl, go sit with the girl with the “Ramen noodle hair.” Go sit with her, and learn her story and learn to cry with her, laugh with her, and breathe her air. If you’re the football stud who claims to have so many girls, unadopted babies, and no cash, do me a favor and learn the story of your black brothers who are not learning responsibility because of your mismanagement of yourselves. If you’re the star white quarterback or center of the sports teams, just do something and sit with the dark haired boy with Down’s Syndrome, and learn his story. Go to a homeless shelter and learn about single motherhood, if you come from an intact family. If you’re a guy who is blonde, stupid, and foolish enough to reject that girl over there who can’t see you, learn why. Don’t defend your foolishness, but learn to tell if your actions are unwarranted. If you’re the men who are lying on Jacob Blake, the man who was paralyzed in Kenosha, Wisconsin, you need to shut your mouths. Shut your mouths, and give Jacob that wheelchair he will need for the rest of his life. Give Jacob a beautiful golden retriever who will pick up dropped items for him, and know that your actions brought on his disability. You caused it, there was no crime. You are guilty of white supremacy and racial profiling under many things, and inciting Jim Crow version 2.0. Just shut up and admit your guilt, but don’t be surprised if you’re in jail with the very brethren you despise. You lie on Briana Taylor who did not want you shooting her in her sleep. You lied on all the unarmed black teenagers, allowed a white idiot named George Zimmerman to kill Treyvon Martin. He didn’t deserve to die, and a rapper did a tribute song to this boy, who played football. Just think about this. If you can’t handle the melting pot, the racial rainbow our country is supposed to be, I’ve got a place you can go to.

Go to Russia, Siberia, Antarctica, the cold climates in the world, and never even think of coming back. Take your white supremacies, your tattoos of the Aryan Brotherhood, your 911 calls on a suspicious person who is African American, your suspending young black girls from school for having the wrong hairstyle, take it all to Siberia with you. I don’t want to see it here, not here, not this year, not this entire millennium. I want it gone, the systemic racism gone, so that my mixed little child or children one day will be living Martin Luther King’s dream, forever. It is highly probable that if your Agent Orange wins another term, my partner and I will have to exile in another country that doesn’t speak our language. This is sad, really sad, and overtly tumultuous circumstances you will try and put us in, and you know what? Love doesn’t like evil, love likes truth, loves the truth, does not boast, is patient, kind, and above all, it burns. Hell, if you step closer to me, the love for my man I have burns like a burning red red rose. Trenton knows my love for him burns like a fire, but as Robert Burns would put it, it is like a red red rose, but for me, it’s definitely like a burning red rose. Picture the flames coming out of the blossoms, that’s what I’m talking about.

Before I close, take heed of what I say. If yyou’re a white person who is not racially woke like I am, just … don’t fool around, stop messing around, as the sheriff said to my great ancestor, James Wade. Just let me have a job, a house, and the pitter patter of little feet on the tile or linoleum floor. Just stop and think about what the pitter patter of little feet will do for me, and the rest of society. That pitter patter will turn into big footsteps, big steps to walking down the aisle, getting a job, and being a responsible citizen. If you have the luck of hearing that pitter patter, take responsibility for showing the owner of those small tiny feet how to walk beside the ponies, but not just that, the family dog, and your black family friends. Teach your child that it’s all right to be whatever you want, and not get your head cut off. I have a dream that one day, this world will bee fair and just, as MLK would put it eloquently. MLK did say this, and this is my closer, “Injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere.”

Beth

Ask What We Can Do For Our Country: My Concerns About Elections This Year

Dear readers,

Imagine a world that was modern, except for the race relations being that of the nineteenth century, when Africans were enslaved in AMerica, when they became the property of whites so much so that they were bred like cattle, sold like property, and the women? They had to wear dresses, skirts, and corsets, but could not vote, speak in public, or do anything to make themselves established. Imagine that you had to worship the KKK or be a member of a similar group, the Proud Boys, Daughters of the Confederacy, or similar neo-Fascist groups. Imagine you, a woman in her thirties, had to have sexual relations with a man you didn’t like, all because he was the higher bidder of your genitalia. This is a world I don’t want to see, where I wouldn’t be allowed to exist. We have a buttload of changes to do, including the removal of white supremacy from every corner of our culture, but I’ll give you an idea of what we must do if Biden gets elected.

Dear Mr. Biden, I’d write, I understand freedom of speech allows people to associate with whomever they want, but the responsibility isn’t there anymore. When I was in civics classes and social studies in fourth grade at Imperial Estates Elementary, I ended up learning that with great power, rights, and freedoms comes great responsibility. Right, Uncle Ben? I’m talking about the dude from Spiderman, not the rice bowl guy.

I’d like to propose something to my Congress peoples, but I want the President to work with Congress to establish a registry of all groups and orgs that do business in the U.S., and color code them based on bigotry and hate, which by consequence could lead some to say, but that’s against freedom of speech. I don’t care anymore because freedom has a cost, responsibility being that cost, and nobody wants that anymore. Nobody wants to shoulder the responsibility to keep your hateful thoughts and violent compulsory crap to yourself, but if you don’t, tragedy could strike. For instance, how many mass shooters write manifestos on 8chan, 4chan, and other sites before committing their crimes? I wouldn’t be surprised that the recent ones did, but these mass shooters, including the Columbine High shooters, wrote evil manifestos about their actions and why they committed their crimes. The El Paso mass shooter wrote on 8chan, a hotbed for white Supremacy, that he hated the Latinx community obviously, and he was irresponsible and hateful. It doesn’t help that you have a president that hates people from Africa, and I won’t let Trenton be deported there because it would mean no Internet contact, no sexual relationship, no nothing. However, a Norwegian immigrant, according to Trump, is more acceptable. Well, I’d like to propose that any Trump supporting hate group fall under two different color codings: yellow and red. Red means that the group might commit the most violent acts, believes in racial purity and hatred, is bigotrous towards disabled and LGBTQI+ individuals, and cannot receive government support. IF a group is yellow, all the other things I mentioned above but violence would be considered in that category. Biden would have to put aside a racist past, barring none, and work with congress to get rid of the KKK, and classify it as a Terrorist organization, which could then open the door for prosecutions of domestic terrorism for anyone who utters a single word, boogaloo. The boogaloo boys, as I like to call any followers of this, could face maximum of ten year prison sentences, spend time being monitored for life, and not be allowed to be associated with one another or the group they had ties to. LEt’s take a typical domestic terrorist, and I’ll show you what it would look like if he was even found to be associated with any fascist groups here.

Once a tie is detected, this person would have to spend years in jail, or be monitored by the FBI, watched by the CIA, and interrogated on every move he makes. Wire taps would be placed on his phone, the same thing we did to the Muslims but this time, it’s time for white people to be surveillance taped and stuff. Yes, it would have court challenges, but I would hope Biden would figure out the truth behind these stupid groups. I believe the KKK should be a terrorist group for several reasons: Trenton, my family, and others would not be safe. My dad might be Bostonian Italian, but his wife is part Irish, German, and others who aided the blacks to freedom. There were Germans who did that bravely, and for this we should bless their memory. My mother’s family has a slave or child of a black slave somewhere in it, but still, she’d not be safe in a world ruled by the Proud Boys, Boogaloo Boys, and other groups that want to divide our nation.

What can we do to stop these neofascists? I know the registry is only half the battle, but a green group which means the group does not advocate violence or bigotry would receive government grants and suport if applied for. For example, I’d like to applaud Soar and Denver Women’s Chorus, the Rocky Mountain Arts Association, and all other GALA orgs for their great good work and their steadfastness against bigots who want to torment their funding sources. Under a Biden or similar Democrat administration, I want to see this type of praise go to green groups, but the other colors mean the group has hints of bigotry and hate in it. Example, most churches might go under green registry colors if they can prove that they can welcome gay and trans folks, but if they are homophobic and transphobic, they will fall under a code yellow or code orange, which is a step below yellow, but orange would mean no racial hatred, but still it would be hatred of a different lens, hatred of LGBTQI+ and disabled people. People should also be able to rate orgs so that grant writers can zero in on the groups receiving more than 3 stars. I’d rate both Soar and DWC 5 stars, but St. Teresa’s Catholic Church would have to be exempt from the U.S. rating system because their church doctrinal headquarters in Rome is located in Italy, not the U.S., but Italy doesn’t have the same law structure we do. In any case, STS and the attached Catholic parrishes would have to fall under an orange color registry unless the Pope makes a serious change to policy surrounding gay marriage and married and female ministry. The Catholic church can’t escape revolutions of any kind, and must conform to human rights standards, whether their headquarters is in the Vatican in Italy or any other nation besides. I would have to subject certain Diocesan housing things to a green registry color because if they follow the teachings of Jesus they have to welcome everybody. Plus federal housing law, blah blah blah blah blah. Whatever, it gets better.

I would like to see an end to neofascism groups like Boogaloo and KKK and the Proud Boys because personally, my partner, who is African American, would not feel safe. He already doesn’t because of masks, pandemic garbage, and so much other stuff. The police killing of Elijah McClane doesn’t help matters either. I don’t wat to live in one of Margaret Atwood’s weird predictions as in the Handmaid’s Tale, I want to live in a world where I can go out and feel safe equally with my partner as well. I want no penalty from church or goverment if we marry, and I want to have children in a place of safety for all, and we need to ask ourselves many questions. JFK Sr. wanted to say this, and he said it quite eloquently when discussing moon landing prospects: “Ask not what your country can do for you; ask what you can do for your country.” What can we do for this country right now? First, we need to shoulder the responsibilities. We have the power of opinions, opposing viewpoints, and many debates, but we want to keep that power. As Peter Parker’s Uncle Ben once said, and I’ll say it again, “With great power comes great responsibility.” We need to hae that responsibility, and learn to coexist with our fellow man, whether black or brown, pink or polka dotted, and we need to realize MLK Jr.’s dream sooner rather than put it off till later. I have his vision, his dream, where I can wake up in a world where my kids one day will not be judged by the color they give off on their flesh, something they won’t be able to change, but by their character and what they can do for the country and the greater human race. When you go vote, whether by mail or in person, remember these things, remember that your safety and responsibilities comes first, remember that all of us are different. Ask not what the government can do for you, but ask what you can do for the government … right, JFK? Yes, the guy was a total washout, a womanizer, but whatever. His words ring true when I think of what is coming for us in a few months. What would JFK do and say if he were able? Well, honestly, I’d like to quote the words of Patrick Henry: “Give me liberty or give me death.” Well, there’s more: give me safety, responsibility, or freedom to be myself and life without penalties for who and when I get married to or whatever, or move me somewhere else. Canada probably, but I don’t see why the U.S. can’t shape itself up in November, get rid of neofascism, and start thinking about ways it can rebuild after this pandemic and racism struggle, and avoid a second civil war.

Beth