From my neighborhood: https://nextdoor.com/p/QMpTmTbqnH6Y?utm_source=share&extras=MjE5Mzc3NTk%3D
So I got a new chromebook, and here’s what I have found. I love it. What else? I”m writing this blog post using my new Chromebook, equipped with two screen readers working in tandem. First, there’s Chromevox, which is built in, and it works relatively well with my app here. The problem is I’m using E-Speak, a robotic sounding thing that drives any decent human bonkers. Oh well, the clear voices will come next stable update. I can’t wait. Trenton says I’m nuts. But oh well, I’m not kidding.
In the post I’m writing here, I can do just about anything. Also, my upcoming posts will I promise you finish off Brave New World. I know some of you will probably go bananas if I don’t finish Brave New World. But I will because it’s important.
Also, I want to thank those of you who like my podcast introduction, and I’m going to do more with that intro sometime in the next few episodes. Maybe even forever. It depends on whether you people actually like it. I’m going to try background music too, but thinking I need more interviews. If you want to be considered for an interview on my podcast, just follow my rules on the website and write me.
What I might consider doing is something like interviewing ordinary people. No, not darn celebrities, so Kim and Donald, you’re not coming. But there’s more interviews we’re going to consider. And this season will end around Juneteenth, which if I’m not mistaken is June 15. Then I’ll take a break and come back for a fourth season.
Right now, I’m stuffed with chicken and dumplings, poor Trenton won’t eat those. Makes me mad, but oh well. Meanwhile, Trenton is just sitting there listening to white noise and such. He does this a lot lately because maybe I drive him crazy a bit too much. No, it can’t be. E-speak doesn’t exactly give me a clue as to what the hell I’m writing, so I’m gonna hang this up for now.
CW Spoilers and TW cultural references to Native Americans, please read with care.
Linda. Where to begin. Her life wasn’t so typical, but in Brave New World, we meet her in two different ways. She started out as a beta plus, which is a step below an alpha plus, and then, we see her as the author was meant to see her. Let’s compare how Linda’s life transformed from book to screen.
In the book, Linda was at first the typical healthy English girl, much like what Lenina was. Linda, a Beta Plus who worked in the fertilizing room, however strong she appeared to be, was left behind in transit when she and the then younger DHC, Tomakin he was called in the book, went to the Savage reservation. In the book, the Savage Reservation was a key negative connotation for Native American reservation. It was probably situated in the Tribal lands in New Mexico. Let’s just refer to the book’s version of it not as a “Savage” place, but as Malpais. That’s what John called it, and for future reference, John is Linda and Tomakin’s child. Back to Linda.
So anyway, Linda was left behind because she fell and hit her head, and some hunters from Malpais found her on the floor and brought her to the lands. Linda didn’t even know she was pregnant at the time, and all girls who are unsterilized in the Brave New World must do what is called “Malthusian Drill.” The numbers, Linda says, go by one, two, and three and so on. Not much is told of how Malthusian drill actually works, and the contraceptive precautions are still on Lenina’s mind in the book after she’s done cavorting with Henry on the golf course, at the cabaret, and then in his room of course. What we learn from Linda is astounding. She had soma before, but when she was forced to live among the Natives in the book, she found herself in a culture shock. One, she was not supposed to just have any man she wanted. People hated her, hated her son John, and it was evident throughout Linda’s future life in the land if Malpais. The Natives sang songs about Linda, not very reverent songs, and the little boys frequently shoved John away, and then, as I wrote prior to this post, the worst of it was when John wanted to do a manhood ceremony among the boys. Now he was able to understand Linda’s world too, but John had some Native American upbringing among the boys and the men of the Pueblo. They taught John about the spiritual practice of the Native American peoples of the pueblo, and he never said the word Ford but said Oh my God instead. John had a lot of respect for the eagle god Pookong, and the son of the One True God, the Jesus everybody complains about in real life. John one day said he wanted to be crucified. If this isn’t a sad person, I don’t know what is.
While John is growing up, he sees his mother, Linda, drunk on the floor or having a lot of sex with Pope, a young man she’s attracted to. Pope brings Linda lots of mescal, which is very strong stuff, but let’s compare this quick to the show. Linda doesn’t drink mescal in the show, instead it’s moonshine.
The most confusing thing about Linda is how she dies. In the show, she’s pictured dead on the marble slab. In the book, Linda’s life among the Natives is brought to a close when Bernard and Lenina rescue both her and her son John. One needs to have at least one reckoning with John and Tomakin, the DHC. Now, Linda’s life in the book and Linda’s life in the show are a bit different. Let’s look at Linda’s on screen appearance.
First of all, Linda is a much the same drunk Beta plus who can’t put up with being happy without drugs. Linda and John are busy trying to get Bernard Marx healed up from a wound he receives at the theater park. Like I said in the previous post, the Native land of Malpais is replaced in the show with a simple theme park, the Savage lands. It’s not about a tribe, but the rebels are hard to tame, according to the all uppity happy Eurocentric New London. Let’s also say that Linda and John were different, and John didn’t share his life story much in Episode 3. The big thing is that John was not greeted by Mustapha Mond, who by the way, in the show was a woman. Why?????? I’m not trying to be sexist here, but if you are going to follow the source material, shouldn’t Mustapha be male? And intimidating? I get that we need progress in the 26th century, but do we want to follow the source material or go our deviant separate way from it?
We deviate a lot when John and Linda are confronted with Madison, the pregnant bride from the theater, and she goes in and says she’s going to kill teh outsiders, Linda, and John. Madison meets her end, which is not saying much of Kiakime, the Native girl John likes in the book. Kothlu doesn’t even speak to John in the book, and Linda tries to understand the whole point of weddings, but then is interrupted by John running away from the wedding procession. The manhood ceremony being the most hurtful thing John is experiencing, he is called the “son of the she-dog.” The Natives’ references to Linda as a she-dog are poignant, but extremely hurtful given Linda’s different culture and upbringing and more importantly, her conditioning.
Linda dies in the book lying comfortably in the bed, the Soma at her side, in the Park Lane Hospital of the Dying, but we don’t see this in the show. Linda is sitting on a morgue slab, the victim of something that went wrong in the rocket, and we don’t know how Linda died … yet. However, John goes mad, and as the happy people of New London will tell you, John doesn’t know how to cope with Linda’s death. This is natural for humans, but with death conditioning, which to me is gross and unnatural, you have tots and little tykes, kids rather, going to a hospital of the dying in the locale and having to eat treats every time someone dies. When Linda died in the book, the young Delta boys in the hospital got eclairs. The boys also got chocolate cream, and this is supposed to make them cope with death? I don’t see that as anything close to natural.
In the show, there is also another plot element. The rebels tell the outsiders, Linda and John among them, that “We are a free people.” They say they’re sick and tired of being fenced in and judged for the amusement of the Indra users, the New Londoners. They’re tired of it. So what will happen next? Stay tuned, and I will write more.
Note that I do like the idea of Mustapha Mond being a woman, but why?????? Why did they have to choose a woman to play the part of a world controller? In the source material, there is quite a bit of gender misinformation, but I see where this is going. The progress to a woman ruling the world is getting stronger every day, and so should be acknowledged in the show. However, do we want to try and reenact Huxley and his source material? Let’s see when I watch next, and yes, I’ll be writing more reviews in the coming days about a future episode or two, but yeah. LEt’s see what the future holds for John, Lenina, and Bernard.
CW Spoilers, details mentioned here are those involving the Peacock/Netflix show Brave New World, and compares to the original source material by Aldous Huxley. Please skip if you never read the book or seen the show, but read on if you want a serious review.
I love old books, and there’s something important to note. Brave New World, the masterpiece by Aldous Huxley, has its own special category of awesomeness that I never fail to be dissatisfied by. First off, this book shows you a world utopian society with a scientific caste system, but beyond this, the show is awkwardly different from the source material. If you have read either book or seen the show episodes 1 and 2, read on. I will be hijacking my own blog to review the entire series a bit at a time. See the above CW (content warning) for details and a spoiler alert is in effect.
Here are the highlights from episodes 1 and 2, and how they compare to the book source material. Did the production company get this right?
- The beginning. In the book’s beginning, we meet the DHC, or the Director of Hatchery and Conditioning for Central London, which in the show is called New London. Nice job, guys. But that’s where the show is a bit different. We meet Lenina Crowne, whose name in the show is pronounced “laneena”, but I totally understand the alternate pronouncing of her name in book narrations I’ve scrolled through. In the book, Lenina is seen injecting her embryonic patients with the usual stuff, and there are students and guides there to see it all happen. However, in the show, it’s just Lenina, brunette instead of blonde (see next item) and she’s injecting embryos as per the usual thing she does. You don’t see Henry though till the middle and the first man Lenina meets in the book is Henry, but in the show, it’s our hero, Bernie or should I say, Bernard Marx. That’s a big deviation from the source materials.
- Lenina’s hair is blonde, and she’s pleasantly pretty in the book. In the show, as described to me through the UK descriptor, she’s brunette. Why the change? Is it that blondes aren’t pretty anymore?
- Savage Lands versus Savage Reservation. Oh, did I mention that savages are mentioned in both books and the show? In the book, however, Native Americans are not portrayed well, as was expected in the 1930s when Huxley wrote the source material, and John of course was a British kid dressing up in Native American attire, and we meet John when Lenina and Bernard went to the “Savage Reservations” in New Mexico in the book source material. How it deviates with the show! We meet John before Lenina boards the rocket to the Savage Lands, and the whole land is a theme park, not a fenced in reservation. John is not among Native Americans, but among people who choose to live a so called primitive existence. John also tries to go after a girl, but we don’t see this in the book until John tells his story to Bernard, and the story is a hopelessly tragic one. John wanted to marry a Native American girl, Kiakime, and the girl was actually married to Kothlu, a young Native boy. Sadly, this show iteration of John and Kia’s romance is worse. Instead of the Native born Kiakime, we get Madison, and instead of Kothlu, we get this stranger from the prop store. Madison is pregnant, and we don’t know who did this, and John is an outcast as in the original source material. See next item.
- The festival deviates from book to show. John’s status with the Natives (I refuse to use the word Savage here.) is so low because they called him names, chanted songs about him, the whole bit. What bothered me most was when John wanted to do a manhood ceremony with the young boys who were to become men, and they said the most hurtful words. “No, not for you, white hair, not for the son of the she-dog.” They referred to Linda, his mother, as such because of her frequent amatory encounters with their men. However, I wouldn’t go about calling women this because it’s rather hurtful, and to refer to her son as a white hair though was worse. In the show, John is told to stay away from Madison, and the guy says, in no uncertain terms, that he’d kill John if he got close to Madison. Linda, of course, objects. We meet John in the book during a drumming festival, and Lenina constantly babbles on about the drums, and she compares them to everything possible, including “a lower caste community sing.” We. haven’t gotten to the community sings, but I’ll suggest we talk about that soon.
- The actual festival in the show was a movie theater, and in that theater, there was a circus of course. This did not include drums, and there weren’t a bad smelling dude who guided Lenina and her compadre around. This seemed odd.
- The rest home. Like, am I going to tell you how deviant that whole thing in the show was? Lenina and Bernard go on a rocket to the “Savage Lands” which as I stated before is a theme park for primitive life. Now, let’s talk about the hotel. Bernard, as in the book, is an alpha plus. Taht’s the highest caste in the caste system in New London. Lenina is a beta plus, one step lower but that is to be expected if you want to stay true to the source material. They receive badges, something not mentioned in the book, but in the book they got keys. The rest house was a private thing, sort of. Now the hotel did have a balcony, and it was much more luxurious in the show. Weirder still, the bureaucrats Lenina and Bernard are treated to a bus tour of the Savage Lands. Now, let’s talk further about the meeting between Bernard and John.
- Bernard is unconscious when meeting John for the first time, but John meets Lenina after they’re hiding in the apartment in the Savage Lands. Let me tell you, the Savage Lands are about five centuries behind the 26th century, but this theme park is no playground. There’s a lot of violence and jealousy and a lot of what you might call the same behavior you’d see in Straight Out of Compton. It’s not the same as in the book, where there’s a highly charged electric fence, and all the Natives are fenced in and not allowed to leave. Lenina is sleeping when John meets her. But in the show, we have Bernard lying wounded, but unconscious, I’m sure he has to make it, and Lenina has her face cupped in John’s hand in the final scene of episode 2. One more detail.
- The Soma rations. Where to begin. The book has lots of instances of the drug known as “soma.” In the show, just about everybody has a soma dispenser, like where to we get creative with this? Soma is amazing, for the most part, in the book. It numbs your mind and it gives you that eternal “soma holiday” as is referenced many times over in Huxley’s source material. However, the dispensers are a show creation. When the people get their soma rations each day, the soma is dispensed to the lower classes in boxes, little boxes, and the boxes hold the little yellow pill in each compartment. Soma rations are given to everybody in the show, but in the show, everybody uses the trains. Where’s the flying? In the book, Henry and Bernard are flying in futuristic helicopters, aircrafts that go from settings like wasp to bumblebee and so on. However, only the lower castes, gamma on down, use the trains and the monorails are packed with them. Every day after the main day shifts are over, you see lines upon lines of these “twins” and so on, and they populate the trains thus far. There’s no helicopters mentioned throughout the show, but you do see futuristic aircrafts flying about New London. I”m impressed with the descriptions of such.
That’s about all the things I can think of for now. For more on Brave New World, watch for the next blog entry. I will also talk a little bit about it on this week’s forthcoming podcast episodes. I’ll do a couple episodes a week of a review, and moreover, this will be incomplete without it.
To find the show, you need either Peacock in the US or Netflix in the UK, but if you’re blind in the US, download from http://www.audiovault.net, and you will need to erase a desktop file in their folder because it messes up the zip archive. Thank you for reading, and enjoy the show if you can.
While all my family will expect me to pay tribute to a grandmother I couldn’t even spend time with for ten years, I would like to also point out that it will have been a whole year since people expected me to bow down and kiss the ass of two very bigoted people. In the blindness community since then, I have seen a great awakening in the group of survivors of sexual abuse. I have also seen a great awakening within myself, especially because the people responsible for the bigotry and the death threat that culminated in months of being exploited on my end, and then the guys expected people to shut me down here on WordPress for defamation. One young lady in Australia tried to report the blog for defamation, but here’s the scoop on that. This woman in Australia is in Australia, not the United States, and has no knowledge of legal matters here. She has no business reporting my blog because she’s Australian, which has a different law structure, also it’s a different set of issues and different government. We have a bicameral legislation here and we have a President, and we elect just about everybody freely and fairly. What Australia does obviously isn’t my business, though I find their politics amusing. The point is that if you live outside the U.S., don’t go reporting my blog if you don’t know the subject material enough to understand why I wrote it.
As for Dirty Money on Netflix, some little weasel sued Netflix to get the segment on guardianship removed. I could have been told to take down the Right Wingnut Roundup, but guess what? Wes and Bill, the guys responsible for the accusations of defamation, can’t get a grip. They’re the bigots, they entertain the thought of police brutality, and my buddy Clayton could have been targeted by the U.S. or other countries for any number of reasons, but you chose to target me instead. Why is this? Probably because Wes and Bill perceived me as weak, but what they don’t get is that threatening people is against the law, illegal. I did not threaten, I only told the truth. It’s been a year since it happened, and since that year has passed, I’ll be darned if I have to change names again. Screenshots of conversations don’t lie, and I can’t alter the evidence, after all that would be tampering with it. Right?
to those who believe that I should be warehoused in a group home, denied the chance to see my partner, and otherwise honed in to guardianship, guess what? You’ve got something coming. Guardianship is evil, and I’ve been the victim of such. I was denied the chance to see those I cared about, and the minute someone finds out I’m in guardianship who’s a vision or blindness professional, my expectations in terms of DVR and professionals like that are lowered to the floor. DVR in Colorado won’t support my dream of being a musician, and I wanted training so I could produce and learn how to use the program Komplete Kontrol, I have the m32 midi setup but I had to uninstall much of it because of the space limitations on my drive and Big Sur. Ugh. But the biggest problem I have with DVR is the gender based stereotypical chores I was forced to do over all the others. I won’t be cooking or cleaning my living space for anyone but me, myself, and I and my partner and immediate family products, likely children and or pets. I’m not your maid, so I should say. The big thing I want to stress is that I’m not anyone’s nanny or handmaid, and if I had my skills abused by someone, it was likely my parents. They abused my talent for music, honed it in to church mass every Sunday, and expected me to stay Catholic and asleep.
The big thing bothering me is how people view me as a woke person, and let me tell you what woke is. When you’re woke, you’re awake. You have this sense of being yourself, that it’s okay to feel the feelings you have, that it’s okay to cry if you need to, laugh if you want to, all that. These bigots who censored the Netflix documentary and tried to kill me are not woke. These guys are asleep in the not so comfy embrace of conspiracy against me bullcrap and theories about woke culture that don’t fly and aren’t really in line with what’s acceptable. Even with Trump in office, I was woke. I”m still woke, still awesome, and I have a lot to say. As a woke person, I’m going to stay woke. I was given a very personal statement about the problems of “insane asylums”. One man puts it that woke culture is controlled by psychiatric patients not on medications. I don’t believe that for a split second. I’m on abilify, and I could have been on a ton of sedatives. I could have been on dangerous medications that made me drool all over myself, speak incoherently, and not know what is going on. I was on a mood stabilizer that caused a seizure, how’s that for scary. I don’t think institutionalization is a right and fair process, and even my friends think it’s okay for this to happen. It’s not. This man I speak of is blind and in his forties, but yet still doesn’t have a paid job, but lives with family. This same man could easily be targeted by someone and yet doesn’t know how awful the system is. As Rosamund Pike says in I Care A Lot, and let me paraphrase, she says she can put sedatives and all kinds of bad things in your food, deny you food, all that. And then she says, “I own you.” She’ll own you, this fictional guardian that Pike portrays in I Care A Lot. I watched that whole movie and wanted to jump through the screen and smash the whole system. As the action unfolded, things got really weird and wild. When one of the characters, Roman, is put to sleep on tranquilizers, the character of Marla goes “Sleep tight, motherfucker.” Wow, I thought, how damn heartless she was. Sleep tight, motherfucker, I want to say to those who don’t want to get woke and realize that guardianship is evil. If you side with evil, you’re not probably trying to read this blog. IF you’re going to read this, wake up, motherfucker. Wake the hell up. I could have been threatened with death by the lady I like to call Avilar Karen, and what I am about to tell you might startle you. It might not.
When the lady called me threatening me, she sided with evil. Wes had commented on this blog that “the guardianship your parents had in Florida was correct” among other things. I should have said this is a little paraphrase of what he said, but I spammed the comment because I needed readers to understand that the comment Wes wrote was sacreligious to me. Wes’s comment was deleted because it contained defamatory and ableist information about me that readers don’t need to or want to know. I blocked a young lady in Wisconsin for writing that it would be my parents’ business to terminate pregnancy if I got pregnant. That the guardianship was okay was not a misnomer on this young lady’s part. I blocked others for being evil, unfriended a few people’s pages for the very crime of banning me from speaking, silencing and retaliating against me for being myself. I can’t afford a criminal record, going to jail requiring the cash bale system. I hope that people understand that filing a police report against someone in Denver when you live in Iowa or somewhere else is wrong. Wes and Bill’s little stunt with my buddy Clayton hasn’t left me at all, and it could get worse. Here’s why I believe we need change and what we can do to make it happen.
We need change because believing ableist and evil things should be considered a crime, and some form of conspiracy against the disabled entitled white man should also be a thing to scrutinize. There are disabled assholes, I won’t doubt it. However, any disabled person who ginds subminimum wages favorable is a real asshole on I95. Jimmy Buffet, sing it buddy. If you don’t get the reference, it’s the Asshole Song, and Jimmy Buffet and his parrotheads sing this awesome song that pretty much talks about the bad driving on I95. Well, that’s what I compare government officials who favor the subminimum wages to. They are driving badly.
I also found an article in which Marjorie Taylor Greene pretty much mocked trans people. She should be expelled from Congress also because she’s a believer in the Q Anon group. Do you guys know how much that group tears apart families? There’s a guy in an article I read whose stuff was tossed outside and the mother threatened to have her son hurt. I have a message for those people who hinder progress and kick guys like that out of their home. Get your heads right and wake the hell up. Q Anon is a bad group, they’re terrorists, and you can’t negotiate with them. It’s people like that who hamper our efforts to change the nation to something acceptable for black and trans and disabled people.
IF you’re a government official who believes that I should be warehoused in jail for writing this, check your privilege at the door. Police brutality is a bad thing, and I don’t want my partner to die from that. If some cop in Aurora or Denver comes to my door, he should know that I’m not a good target. Trenton who loves me and supports me won’t support your targeting me. The guys who did this don’t realize that they’re going to lose everything if they mess with the wrong person. And they messed with the wrong girl. I don’t want to be put somewhere where I don’t belong. I want to have children, stay with Trenton, and live a happy and uncompromisingly normal life. To those of you who wish to target me, put down your guns and wake the hell up. But if you choose, well, if you choose evil, then sleep tight, motherfuckers. Don’t come crying to me if someone stabs you in the back, whether it’s with a needle or in the mind. Sleep tight, motherfuckers, don’t come crying to me if you’re just like Roman in the hospital with a tube stuck in your throat, or you are like me and get denied the chance to see your beloveds or the person you love. If you wanna wake up, then wake up. Just wake up and come to the front of the line and the middle of the circle. IF you want change, make it happen for the benefit of all, not just you entitled ones.
Please watch this, I forgot to post the HRW thingy, but this is going on Netflix on Feb 19.
In dark Netflix thriller I Care a Lot, a predatory court appointed guardian wreaks havoc, a story that’s far closer to reality than one would expect
— Read on www.theguardian.com/film/2021/feb/17/99-of-the-world-has-no-idea-inside-the-shocking-legal-guardianship-industry
The following is something I found using the Human Rights Watch website. With the publicity of the #freebritney movement, HRW is noticing that guardianships are evil, bad, and wrong. Let me explain the evils of such, and if you are a government official reading this, let me explain how each of these parts of a guardianship is detrimental to your country’s citizenry, particularly those who are of protected classes like LGBTQ or women or persons with disabilities.
- Liquidation. Jamie Spears liquidated the hell out of his daughter Britney, weedling down her estate from over $300 million to just under $60 million in less than probably six months, but this is something I could have gone through. My parents would probably have sold a beginning student flute, absolutely they would have sold all my CD’s, thinking they were collector’s items or something like that. They could have liquidated my *Nsync bobbleheads and sold them all for a price. At auction, who knew what all those collector’s items would have gone for? And then, there go my parents, saying they are rich and can throw me away if they chose. But instead, since there was no trust and estate to weedle down to nothing, since there were no valuables to barter, no house to plunder, they just left the guardianship discharged as of December 2020. I never knew what was in their heads, but I thought I’d never see this day. We need to make all group homes liable in the cases of estate trafficking of disabled citizens of any country in the world. For example, you have a mentally ill or impaired boy who is twelve years old, labeled aggressive in school and all sorts of stuff pops up in his classes, and the kids bully and make fun of him. He can’t communicate the same way as other people, only speaks to you in metaphors, doesn’t give you a good firm grasp of reality from a glance, but you know he’s in touch with reality, and reality hits harder than anything. At eighteen, he’s guardianized by his caring mother in order to protect him from the abusive casework of the state, then let’s say the mother and younger brother both die one at a time because of life circumstances. This young man will be left to the care of a professional guardian who will weedle away his Special Needs trust, take the money and run, throwing him in a group home in the process. This situation is far too common as described to me by one activist I spoke with. What guardians often do is steal a child’s belongings or take the adult’s house and other things.
- Isolation. “You’re not allowed to talk to so and so.” “No phone for a week.” Those phrases I can’t help but wonder if others like myself are hearing all too often in their guardianship hells. Remember Katy, the young Orlando woman I wrote about here in this blog? Well, her phone did indeed get snooped on and snatched away for talking to a guy she liked. She was forcibly broken up with her boyfriend, a group home resident from Miami who truly wants a life away from the system. Katy was told no by her guardians, and this is how it happens. Isolation of the ward is a very big evil and favorite tactic of guardians seeking to please the judge and attorneys, besides the estate trafficking of course. Britney Spears had been so isolated from her boys, I wonder how she feels about seeing them now. She was stripped of custody of her two boys, and now she can’t even see them because of a guardian or conservator saying no, you won’t. This is not acceptable treatment for a ward of any state, a person with a disability, a human being whatsoever. I was told repeatedly that if I called Orien Henry, a friend from school, my phone would be taken away. This is called unacceptable treatment in a restrictive environment. The young man in the vignette above does not have to worry about this, but it could be a ticking time bomb if a professional such as Bessimore Trust was put in charge of the young man’s trust, care, and personal freedom. Parent as adversary is most common, and the favorite way to stoop the ward subject low in life is to isolate them. I was so isolated that by the time I got to Colorado Center for the Blind, I had to relearn blindness skills and how to talk to others, and ultimately was alienated from certain peer groups and in trying to get away from the immature group of folks, I had to get counseling. There were people at CCB who acted like it was high school, and I didn’t want to see that kind of thing, all that because I was in Titusville, seeing this same abhorrent behavior. I was also subjected to name calling, Islamophobia, and all kinds of abuse from my peer group because I chose to date a Somali boy. Well, I was also seeing a lot of antiimmigrant sentiments from most of the white folks in CCB and their ITP program, and I couldn’t really pin a label on it yet. Being isolated reminded me that the world was waiting for me to step out, but because I was isolated, bullying was what my peers chose to do. The NFB is a clearly Islamophobic organization and I didn’t even know it, but for me in isolation, it was either NFB or stay in isolation. I got through CCB and graduated, but then I was trying to make friends among Mosque attendees in Denver. The problem I saw was that any man interested in marrying me was a stranger, and I could have been further isolated. I left Islam not because of my ex, but because of the mentality of the brothers in most of the Islamic centers anywhere in the world, that women should be isolated from the men who were unrelated, making it impossible for me to get to know a potential husband in the community, and I wasn’t about to get barefoot and pregnant with just anyone, no matter what deity allowed me to love him. He had to be someone I could trust, someone with a disability so superiority was wiped out, and someone with talents and interests similar to my own. In Islamic circles, music is supposedly the call of the devil, but I wasn’t about to let a religious extremism insult my musical career. This was essentially the nail in the coffin for myself and my ex, and furthermore me and Islam. Allah didn’t like music, so I couldn’t be in a religious group that didn’t appreciate my music, and since Arabic was not a language I spoke, forget it. Isolation had a greater impact on who I chose to marry in the end. I met my husband online, and we met, but the relationship should have gotten slower and it felt like a whirlwind tour of Africa the way it was going before. But the thing was, we had to go to a marriage counselor, and because of the way I was called nasty sexual names that would not look nice in print, something about a dog in heat, I had to cut off someone who we both thought was friendly to us and our relationship. My husband insisted that his “sister” go to our wedding, but the pandemic changed that and her actions toward me changed everything between all of us. We no longer speak to her, and we can’t given her actions. She chose to abuse rather than uphold me. This happens oftentimes to women who are isolated, and isolation any further in Florida could have cost me my life.
- Overmedication. Another favorite evil tactic guardians use is overmedication. Guardians love it when a charge is sedated. They can also be dangerously close to allowing a perverted caregiver to seriously have sex with their charge if the charge is overmedicated. Most of the time, however, overmedicating someone leads to them obeying orders and looking on helplessly as their friends are taken away, their phones stolen, and other property pilfered. A guardian will overmedicate the ward so that they can’t participate in everyday activities like a relationship or group of friends, and then they will lie about the person’s condition in court. This is health trafficking as described to me by activists LuAnne Fleming and Rick Black. I want to thank these folks for opening my eyes big. Overmedication happened to me, and almost could have been worse. I had to take fistfuls of meds according to the Brevard County School system, and they wanted me to be sedate and pliant, but the antidepressants and mood stabilizers I was put on cost me many pounds of weight, a doctor saying I had to drink insure, which is a meal replacer, and worse, I had to be carried out of a room because my parents wanted to steal things from me. I was about done and tired of it. They had guardianship when I was seventeen because of false claims of sexual abuse, and they claimed Rico will have sex with me as described in prior blog postings. Rico never did this, so I am going to label that as a lie. The overmedicated me at sixteen was zoning out in chorus class, clinging to life as it should be, but then I didn’t care what happened. My parents were emotionally abusive and did not understand that their parenting was literally making me sick. The medication didn’t help. Worse, John E. McCarthy, the former psychiatrist who prescribed the medication, was later demoted and deprived of his medical license anyway because according to a headline in the Florida Today or some other paper, McCarthy was having sex with patients and was not taking care of alcoholism. The man didn’t do much good, and when I went to another psychiatrist, it was an older gentleman who later died. I was taking a lot of mood stabilizing drugs like Tryleptol, and I’m still taking an antipsychotic called Abilify. It’s not a drowsy med, but why I am taking it, there’s no real understanding here on the part of this patient writing it all down. When I was on the tryleptol, I also came down with a bladder infection while under the care of an Irish guy called Kensla, and Dr. Kensla found trace of white blood cells in my urine sample, so had to put me on yet another med, septra. Unfortunately, because I was on tryleptol, the septra didn’t play so nicely with the other medications in my bloodstream, and I had a very terrible seizure that brought an end to a graduation party from college. I was about to hold the party, it was all set up, when bells rang in my brain, and suddenly, I fell unconscious, and a buddy of mine called Josh called 911 on his cell. He was caring enough to recognize that I had a seizure and needed to go to the hospital. Five minutes later, I was on an ambulance at Parrish Medical Centre, a hospital in my hometown, and was being hovered over by nurses, doctors, and EMT’s. It was a scary situation, but the highlight of that was that I was also executed sort of. Want to know what happens when your potassium levels go to shits? The seizure was the effect of being executed while on death row, and yet my living room at that time was almost a death chamber. Thank God I am alive, but hearing the ER notes scared me half to death. My parents had to change the bladder infection meds, and gave me a salt booster and made me eat lots of junk food. Okay, that was fine, but why the medications in the first place? I was frail feeling, and I wished I wasn’t living with my family at that time. My dad did however leave me with a wise adage, “When you’re young, pile on the sodium but when you’re old, reduce it.”
- Visitation and cremation upon death. Visitations were indeed monitored by my guardians, and they limited times I could talk to people on the phone and used the phone as punishable bait, and like the vignettes above, it was hard. I didn’t get to visit favored relatives, so I can say none of them understand what they were faced with and if I died under guardianship, I might have been a collector’s item, my ashes sold at auction to a professional and left in her office. Oh, a note about the pronoun “her”. Most professional guardians who have killed their clients, the ones in the paper at least, were older women. I’m using the female pronouns for those people like Rebecca Farrel and Tracy Hudson. Tracy stole money from elders she was caring for, bought Tampa Bay Buccaneer football tickets and ordered DNR for some of her clients. Rebecca had some of her weakest clientele in her office as nothing but ashes. What would have happened to me? I might have been kept in an urn, just a bad tank full of ashes, ashes to ashes. My ashes wil have been scattered about, and my parents would not have cared one way or another and the professional guardian would have said, “Oh well, I did a DNR on your daughter because she was sick.” I call bullshit. Sickness doesn’t just happen, and the medications I was on might have made me experience tartiv disconesia which is a tremor in the nervous system that causes your arms and legs to shake a bit, or you could have involuntary movements of the tongue and such. These are the evils of guardianship, and if you are willing and able, and you’re a government official, there is more you can do for citizens in your countries.
- Illegalize all other forms of guardianship except for a child’s natural guardianship.
- Illegalize the trafficking of estates and possessions by people other than the owners of such assets as houses and cars. If anyone wants to go into the caregiving profession, demand criminal background checks for all involved.
- End the representative payee program for SSI recipients. It’s radical, but must be done. Clients from school age should be learning monetary skills anyway, but if they have intellectual disability, the program should be reformed so that others don’t have full control of their finances. Example, if Britney spears had SSI, her father would not be able to be her payee, not under my plan, and Britney would have full control of money and things, on top of which, if she had any reason to give out money, it would have to be for food and shelter purposes. Examples of this might include a caregiver going to her local grocery store on Britney’s behalf and bringing home food. I trust my caregiver to do this, but she is not I repeat not my payee. I don’t want a representative payee because they could easily spend that money, either mine or my partner’s, on drugs, cigarettes, luxury goods, whatever, against the partner’s wishes. If the child recipient needs a guardian to help with finances, that would work. My caregiver’s daughter is naturally her charge, and the caregiver is her mother, therefore her guardian by nature. In this way, the monetary stuff can be shared, and she may then use the SSI check to do the things she needs, but those needs must benefit the child. That is fine by me, but adults? Forget that.
- Create a world in your country where acceptance of all peoples with disabilities is mandatory. Include integrating disabled kids into regular school systems, protect disabled citizens from discrimination and don’t let females collect dust on the shelf labeled “to abuse.” Females are not to be guardianized on the basis of sex, right, Prince MBS? Women may not seem like your ideal personage, right, Yemen and Jordan? But think about this. Women in islam should be equal to men, and their roles in family life should be elevated, and moreover, we need to combat inequality for disabled women by allowing them to choose who they want to live with, marry, or be intimate with. I’m also talking to you, Dubai. Let your princess do what she wants, because of this whole British thing. The princess has a right to leave, so let … her … go. I’m sure the UN commissioner on human rights would have a field day if you killed her. So just do the right thing and let her go.
- Illegalize all forms of pseudoscience, and demand higher standards than ever in your medical schools. Doctors should learn what calmative drugs can be used for, how chemical restraint could lead to death, and other things. All medical doctors should be forced to agree with and comply with a serious form of the Hypocratic oath which should be amended to say that all patients with disabilities have rights, and should be treated with extra care should they request it. Chemical restraint is not the best interest of the patients, rather it is the best interest of the Devil, Death, and Evil guardianship Law. No doctor should be allowed to overdose a patient on medications like mood stabilizers where the patient is unable to express themselves. Antidepressants should be taken sparingly. Doctors should get inside their patients’ shoes as much as possible, even if they themselves are stil in med school. I’m calling on medical schools to teach psychiatrists better ways of handling desires from guardians to restrain their patients, and attorneys should not be a part of the medical equation at all.
- Take the attorney out of the equation of medical practices. Judges and lawyers with salacious histories should not be allowed to make any judgments on guardianships. No judge should ever be a judge or attorney unless they learn that playing dirty games is not something to do on behalf of someone or their estate. Attorneys should never file motions to declare someone incompetent for blindness, and all law students in a school like the Florida State law School should be required by law in all areas to learn about disability law, practice with disability lawyers, and should be required to either uphold a code of ethics upon graduation or lose their jobs, and be investigated by ethics committees. Colorado has a salacious history of judges and lawyers being bratty and saying and doing sexist things, so we need to further amplify the need for more ethical individuals in law professions.
Thank you for reading this and I hope that in doing the reading, you are listening to your inner selves, creating a vision of a world free of guardianship abuse and conservators who pilfer assets and other things from people because they have a disability.
I am very sads to write this post. I want to tell you all about a big grand building, but I also want to tell you about a staged coup that could have gone completely Gilead like. So let’s start with the building I want to describe.
Imagine yourself in a big giant rotund hollow hallway, statues everywhere, and one set aside in gold. There are statues made in many different things, many types of styles. Remember humanities class? There’s a statue in kubis style, the statue of Father Kino, who was a dear friend of the lepper people, those with leprosy. There is a statue of King Kamehameha, whose name fits where he’s placed, “the lonely one” in Hawaiian. There are statues of very different American and world people who are famous. I don’t call them the gods, I don’t dare do such things, but statues like these are very sacred objects in the American story. Does anyone remember what it used to be like to live in a leprosy colony? I don’t think so. Molokai was an island where leprosy patients were segregated, and there were people who contracted the disease and died. Father Kino to me was a hero among such people because he did what Jesus would do. Jesus, as a spiritual mentor to so many, did what I would suspect he’d do for leprosy patients. He never stayed away from them or blind people, deaf people, people who are not able to walk, etc etc. I could say lame and mute but what good would that do? It wouldn’t do us any good to mention what Kamehameha was famous for either. He was a king. Hawaii was a monarchy, but above that, Hawaii’s schools are a bit racist because they require Hawaiian native blood in their students. This doesn’t surprise me because not only that, the rest of America was racist too. Native Hawaiians were ousted from their so called kingdom and then Hawaii became one of our fifty states, but at no cost to those who sought to destroy them. Either way, I wish there had been a statue of Queen Liliukilani, and she had a song that was written about her. Let’s be real though, I love the idea of visiting Hawaii, but the real Hawaii Native peoples should stop trying to limit their students in schools to Hawaiian blooded kids. There are white and black students who would probably fit in okay in the extended ohana, and what does ohana mean? Well, the lonely king of Hawaii couldn’t tell us now, but let’s be real. Ohana, as Stitch would say in Lilo and Stitch, means “family, Ohana means nobody is left behind or forgotten.” Stitch realized all this while he felt like an outcast. I hope Stitch’s story also teaches the Native Hawaiians that no matter how big or small or no matter what shape, a dog is a dog, a man is a man. In other words, human beings are human beings. And I wonder why Kamehameha’s statue was so lonely over there in the Rotunda.
There were lots of works of art in the Capitol but let’s be real about that. I don’t think art is a bad thing. I studied statues in humanities class, among which was a copy on a lawn of Michelangelo’s David, nude and all. Kind of interesting, I was only eighteen when I saw that thank goodness for the first time. Yeah, it was only a statue, but David is seen in Europe, lots of the great stuff is in Europe. Sadly, even the Pieta has seen its share of vandalism in the world of art.
I got a Pieta figurine my parents bought from Italy, blessed by the Pope. However, it wasn’t tall. One thing I liked about the statues in the Rotunda in the capitol was that they were majestic and tall, and word has it they tell stories. Like Kamehameha and Kino, each statue tells a story in American history. Let’s talk about the stories each one might tell you.
Imagine you walk through the Capitol and hear all the statues start talking. I had to write this down for the Daughters of the American Revolution essay contest. Oops, not a good idea because I never would have won anyway. My writing probably would suck anyway. I had the best time with the tour guide, and the tour guide was awesome. But think of what the spirits that house within the stories and the art are saying now that rioters left trash all over.
So what happened on January 6, 2021? First off, rioters and terrorists entered the Capitol unlawfully. They not only attacked Congress and stole things and looted crap, they did something I’d never think anyone would do. They attacked the spirits of the dead. Imagine a statue of Ruth Bader Ginsburg talking, no screaming, “Stop, you lousy fools, get away from me. Leave me alone, don’t put trash on me.” Kamehameha would shout, “Shut your mouths, you damn haoles, get the hell away from me.” Father Kino would nod his head and pray, god forgive these uglies, for they know not what they do. Then a statue of MLK Jr. would spit out, “Get the hell off my property. God abhors you, you white supremacist demons.” If I saw a statue of Sacajawea, she’d utter something like, “Leave this earth as it should have been untouched by your pilfering hands. Get off my ground and step lightly. Mother Earth shall have her revenge.” Now, imagine what the portraits and art faces would say if you walked in to the hall of First Ladies.
First of all, I imagine that the dead first ladies would haunt the rioters. While they were confronted by police, only four of them died. Four out of thousands. And yet the police would kill more if they were black. This is why the Capitol police chief is resigning. We need to seriously get rid of systemic racism, and what if the coup had been successful? Well, first of all, spiritual energy would be a lot more powerful than the Supremacists who are haunting my spaces. So let’s be clear.
Ruth Bader Ginsburg probably sent that little fly and she might have been inside that fly, sitting gently on Mike Pence’s head. What’s funny about that was that the fly had its own Twitter account? Well, that fly probably would have died by now, but what will Ruth become next? I believe in reincarnation and the freedom of a spirit to do what it will. So if Ruth knows anything, it’s that a coup would have ended in the following scenario:
- My rights would have been violated, nonexistent, and I would have been required to submit to the will of boogaloo assholes, preferably the militias that might storm the city of Denver. I could have been sold to a Florida master, along with my husband who could have been beaten, exterminated along with millions of his people, and so much other stuff. The first thing I thought when I heard the Capitol riots happened was the Handmaid’s Tale. Why? Because Gilead might have formed out of these Proud Boys, Boogaloo and Q Anon idiots. They are, rest assured I say this, terrorists. What is a Terrorist? Well, read the book Terrorism: a Special Kind of Violence. They don’t always terrorize in the name of God either. These Terrorists terrorized in the name of concepts and ideas I feel are very very dangerous and are not up for debate. For example, Trump keeps weakening LGBTQ protections, but that’s not really up for debate when Biden gets to be President, and that is because I’ve got friends in that community and they are human like everybody else. They just happen to be bisexual, gay, transgender, and so on. Trump wants to keep a ban on transgender people in the military, but I know Biden would find it offensive and wrong. While he is Catholic by nature, I totally understand Biden’s wish to make sure that human rights are not up for debate. The Proud Boy Boogaloo Q Anon Trumpist Terrorists that attacked my country several days ago are not just white Supremacists, ableists, and straight entitled white brats who haven’t learned that losing is okay, they are also people who would incite more violence if permitted on Twitter, Facebook, and so on. Censorship aside, the social media networks did the right thing. Why? Because I don’t want a Gilead, but here’s a big difference. Commander Judd did not have social media, and neither did his little friends. Where are the Handmaids? Where will the commanders come from? Well, Q Anon being extremist, I would never want one guy like that for a husband if commanded. I don’t want to have babies with anyone but someone I love and care about. If the men come shooting my beloved people, they will have to understand why they are being charged with murder.
- The black people’s right to exist would be in question. Boogaloo and Q Anon probably will form a Confederacy and make slavery legal. Well, that can’t happen for several reasons. I will never let it, the masters are evil, and my beloved is black. I won’t allow people like this in our home, in our territory. We need to get a house that ultimately has lots of space for children, us, and possibly … I don’t know. But no servants at all. As a person who was mistreated and accused of wrongfully being a bad and evil queen at a young age, well, I now have to have supports. Q Anon and Boogaloo are hell bent at taking that away from me and other people who need it. They would sell me as a freak show, want me to do things, or get my ass shot like a disposable cat that had to be put down. No, I won’t have this happen. Let’s make one thing clear: I won’t let slave traders in my home, whether they give me a good deal or not. I will not sell a person or a living flesh of mine no matter how poor. We’re not Afghanistan.
- Women’s literacy would be banned. My blog would be shut down, and Wes would be dancing in his boxers for hours. Well, right now he better not be dancing around in his boxer shorts reading my blog for no apparent reason. I want to be able to type this blog without fear of a defamation lawsuit, and if anyone, Wes, Bill, or even the bad guys who supposedly want me dead keep putting out screenshots of my stuff, go right ahead. You won’t win because my buddy in Arizona got a screenshot of you first. So why target me? Is it because I’m female? If you want to govern this country, women’s literacy and opinion is not up for debate. Got it? Good.
- Men would have a sphere of influence, and women would have limited spheres of influence. Right, Aunt Lydia? Well, the aunts and those in charge of oppression would be allowed to read or write. NOt my partner, not me, not anyone else. Voiceover on this mac would become liable for being made illegal, and it would be illegal for blind people and female voices to be heard and respected. This is something that I’m sure the Q Anon extremist people would never really want, but in their hearts, they want privileges kept for themselves.
So what should the Biden administration do to prevent violence like this in the future? Here’s a few notable hints, and Joe, if you’re reading this, please note that I support whatever you decide. These are just my thoughts, remember?
- Ban all MAGA hats, Q symbols, and other things associated with Q Anon and Boogaloo, except for Hawaiian shirts. Just make note that Hawaiian shirts should have a disclaimer on them saying they are not associated with Boogaloo. Please wear your Hawaiian shirt responsibly.
- Banning people who have white nationalist ties in the police force is another thing we need to do. I don’t want people who are nationalist working for any police forces, especially if their intent is to target my family, my friends, and allies in the gay community, black community, and the disabled community.
- I don’t want to see Armageddon, but please, we will have to limit Bible content in classes so as not to offend those who don’t practice biblical principles. Sure, study the KJV, but please, none of the book of Genesis would be allowed to be read except as a comprehensive myth. The Genesis myth would also include the parts about Eve and Adam and all that. Using “Eve’s Curse” to tax tampons is a sin, a grave sin against women. And because we learn that Eve ate the apple, women are automatically dirty and sinful. We need to shift our thinking in that regard, and understand that the Biblical Genesis story was written by a man. Not a woman, and the Hebrew scriptures were written and authored by Man. God could not have possibly wanted women to have to be unclean during five to seven days of the month. I could go on and on, but no more of this dance in my boxer shorts will cool this part down. We also need to confront our past without erasing it. The Capitol riots will go in the history textbooks, and my kids will start learning black history ASAP.
- I would like Mr. Biden’s administration to do better with human trafficking prevention and survivors of such. First, if Joe wants, maybe we can talk about legalizing sex work. Why? So the pervs don’t go after little kids. You prevent one thing by forbidding it, alcohol for example, and human beings go nuts. Look what prohibition did for us. The only good thing it brought was … NASCAR. I kid you not.
- Joe Biden should legalize marijuana immediately. As immediate as humanly possible. The failed war on drugs will fail us further if we don’t. Thank you goes to Governor Jared Polis for being wonderful and saying he’ll request money for Cannabis entrepreneurs, so that’s awesome.
- The entire Congressional body should be required not to carry guns with them in the Capitol, and likewise police officers should never carry guns in the Capitol building, and in and around the D.C. area. We need heavy and strict gun controls in place to prevent rioting, and here’s another catch. Officers will not be allowed to wear Riot shields, or have rubber bullets, or whips, or clubs, whatever. Officers will only have their stuff on them that they can use to deescalate the situation. So let’s say the White House was rioted on. Well, they have dogs and guns there, but that will be an exception. But I don’t want crazy Lauren Beauvert to carry her gun around and object to anything Biden does. Beauvert is kind of out there, I’ll admit, but she was elected. In Pueblo, Colorado I might add. But I don’t want anyone, not even Ms. Beauvert carrying damn guns into the Capitol and shooting their fellow Congresspeople to death.
- Swastikas and Nazi symbols should be banned. We must also not forget that the Mein Kampf should probably be labeled with a cultural violence and whatever kind of warning so that if I ask why we’re studying it one day, whoever assigns it knows why I ask for this warning. Mein Kampf is Hitler’s Bible of sorts. Hitler wrote that disabled people were not desirable, and thus killed millions and thousands more. It wasn’t just the Jewish people. He persecuted so many people, just as Donald Trump tried. Because of Hitler, I decided against hearing Wagner’s Bridal Chorus, a song most popular at weddings, at my own commitment ceremony. Richard Wagner was a composer of operas that Hitler particularly favored, and the sturm und drang was particularly his favorite musical style. Hitler started out in an abusive family, even when his father was abusive, his mother tried to protect him. However, I think the father’s abuse and instilling entitlement drofve little Adolf to do big bad things. Same with Donald Trump. Please read Too Much and Never Enough: Why My Family Created the World’s Most Dangerous Man by Mary L. Trump. She’s a psychologist, knows her stuff, and knows her family. Mary narrates this book, and does it really well. I’d like to say I’d pay big bucks to have Mary as my therapist because we’d have a lot of things to be worried about and talk about. Sure, I would never mention her sick and psychotic uncle, but I would mention the effects his ass backward rhetoric has on me and others. She knows. She knows all.
While I’m unable to sleep here tonight, I’m going to be honest. My damn headset is not charging for some strange reason. The Aftershokz headphones I got won’t charge. Ugh.
Also, the season of the Throne Room with Beth Taurasi will begin when Joe gets inaugurated, and I’m going to hope for some champagne or wine to celebrate.
Let’s be clear: this year has been a real … as I said on FB, I said it was a cluster something. Some might call it a cluster fuck, a real conniving cluster fuck that ruined the futures of 300,000 people plus and their families. Let’s take a look though at some of the good and the bad that happened to me and this blog this year.
- In January, things started out okay. When February came, Trenton and I celebrated four years together. It seems like a billion years ago we were able to go to a restaurant and eat. A restaurant such as red Lobster or perhaps Olive Garden would have served you indoors, period. But see below for why not.
- I experienced a pandemic year for the first damn time. It was 102 years ago that the Spanish influenza pandemic swept the world. What have we learnt? Well, in 1918, there were little hope for vaccinations for the flu, let alone polio and diphtheria and other diseases. In 2020, we somehow come up with a vaccine that took years in the old days to come to at all. In 1918, kids dropped like flies if they were under 5 years of age. But in 2020, we now have the resources to fix things like childbed fever and the common cold for crying out loud. This year is the year of the Corona Virus. That’s no Chinese New Year’s joke either. While the Chinese have tried to wipe off the Tiananmen Square massacre from their Internet, they are also trying to wipe off the Ouigars who are Muslim from their list of identities. YOu are either a Han Chinese person or you’re not. It all starts in Wuhan, in Hubei Province in China where all this got started, and I have a message for the people who want to sell the wet meat there. Don’t. Now you see what can happen if you don’t clean and do hygiene on yourselves and your meat wares. Just don’t let the virus mess your lives up, and watch with microscopes next time, eh?
- This year we had canceled events everywhere, including conventions and concerts. The blind conventions went virtual. And online learning is a priority, even for those with disabilities. But disabled students suffer now.
- In March of this year, I received a death threat. Note that I’m using the names that popped up in a screenshot I shared in March of this year. Wes Derby and Bill Boules’ names are written all over this screenshot, and they claim that police accountability boards are a way to give criminals power, and to add insult to injury, Mr. D. decided to tell me that the guardianship was correct. First and foremost, guardianships are evil, plain and simple abuse, and furthermore, allow the person in question to be beat up, imprisoned, and perhaps killed for money and or behaviorism. and ableism. There is a lot of white supremacist ableists in the blind community itself, which makes me sad. Wes and Bill had to go from my life, and I did something I thought I’d never even do. I wrote them off my Skype list, and furthermore, I am no longer afraid to say it. Thet Karen who called me up threatening me to death will not be named because she didn’t leave me her name, but let this be a lesson to anyone who strikes at the heart of my advocacy work: don’t do it. Target me and your twitter or Facebook might just get blocked. Target me and you might find yourself out of a job, out of a life of your own. I’m sorry, sorry that you have alcohol use problems or epilepsy or anything else, or if your socks keep walking away from you, but you are not invincible, but frankly neither am I. I’m not perfect, but if you target someone trying to work her way up out of poverty, you’re off your roster, or as Tom Hanks’s Woody says in Toy Story, you’re out of your box.
- In May and June of this year, there was nothing more to do. Trenton and I decided to change our commitment ceremony plans for like the umpteenth time and we had to do what we had to. We canceled an event that could have taken place in June, and moved it all the way to November. We could have easily tried a day in March, but corona virus ruined our plans. I’ll write more about the commitment ceremony in a bit.
- I was frequently trolled on this blog over evidence that my ex Jason Owens is a stalker and possibly could have committed murder. Well, while the evidence is there that he’s a stalker, and I received multiple calls from other sources confirming his pattern of abusive behaviors, I do not know where anyone would say he committed murder. As an old friend once told me, you do the crime, you do the time. Jason should have done time for what he did to me, what he also did to several girls in my community, and I had multiple victims come forward with stories about him individually. I may be talking about these on my new season of The Throne Room with Beth Taurasi. Stay tuned.
- I started my podcast back up again, and Anchor has changed a lot. For one, Spotify owns it. For another, I like the trailer part of the podcast where I made what is supposed to be a great ear catching trailer about what my podcast is about. I’ll be changing the trailer for season III soon. The first two seasons were good, but I had a lot to talk about. School is important and I covered that, and I covered all the things that needed to be covered. Shootings of black males became the forefront of the year 2020, and I was no exception to reporting that Jacob Blake was shot and paralyzed. Why? Police brutality. This is something Mr. D. would advocate, but worse off, there are other blind people who are sweeping things under the rug. As I’ve said in prior items, there’s supremacy and bigotry in my own community, and it needs to quit.
- In September, I’m pretty sure I went to Chili’s and the doc says I might have gotten corona virus, but who knew. I had the following symptoms: swollen throat, cough, loss of voice for a bit, two weeks of this crap, stuffy nose, loss of smell and taste. Before you run into me and say the corona virus taught me not to mes with certain people, I’m gonna say this. I could have died. Do you wish death on me? No. I hope not. But dear readers, you really should evaluate what your priorities are, and think about who you want to wish blessings upon. I’m only here reporting what needs to be reported here in WordPress, and the truth is the truth. I shared the screenshot in March, stamped out the stalkers and I’m going to be honest: I’m going to fight psychos and trolls throughout my advocacy journey, so … just shut up and keep reading. I recovered from the corona like symptoms, but don’t know if I truly had it. I couldn’t eat and couldn’t drink for some time and had to lay down a lot. It just makes me ill thinking that I might have had this big bad virus, it might have been a super nasty cold. Either way, my voice sounded like crap compared to what it could have sounded like on my commitment ceremony. More on that later.
- In October, I met my minister, Jenny, from Jefferson Unitarian Church, through nothing more than a casual google search for a UU church that might support a commitment ceremony. Jenny was amazing, and she was the intern minister, and best of all, a female which I refuse to take a male at that time because the male would or could charge a hefty sum, require counseling we couldn’t do because of the patriarchal nonsense I don’t subscribe to, and then there’s the point of religious churches who say you have to be a member to get married by the ministers there. JUC was amazing in allowing me to borrow their minister so I could have a better experience, and best of all, JUC is led by the honorable Reverend Wendy Williams, who is amazing at her work, and I’ve seen the main crew doing their thing at services. I’m proud of JUC for also confronting white supremacy in the face, making it safer for those of color and brown folks alike and white folks too. JUC has shown they are committed to ending the white culture embedded within the UU church, and confronting unsafe cultural practices so that those with color or women or blind people can be welcomed. I hope this church shows that it is welcoming to people with disabilities, including offering transport and such. When the services went completely online, I was thrilled to finally access church even though churches have since the pre pandemic days been unwelcoming. What JUC has done is something no church would bother with, only most churches as I’ve said time and time again make charity projects out of the disabled. Now, Jenny had the opportunity to perform a private spiritual ceremony for me and Trenton, did I say I was gonna write about that?
- I was committed on November 7, 2020. No, not committed to a hospital, but a spiritual commitment to Trenton. I want to do a two parts to this one. While the ceremony was great and grand, Jenny did a really great job of gathering great readings together to make the ceremony authentic to us, not some closed religious sect. For one, I couldn’t think of any but Biblical readings since I had so many biblically minded men in my life, but we had a reading by a famous author and several prayers that were amazing. The chalice lighting was beautifully done with a water powered thing so that Jenny didn’t have to burn down the building. We joked about the fire alarms, but Jenny said, don’t worry about this. She brought her water powered chalice and we did the ceremony right then and there. Our supports person was there and did the ring bearing job, something that should have been the job of a young girl or boy. However, we were only allowed five people total including our household of two. Therefore, we had Jenny, the supports lady, and her friend who volunteered to do camera angling so I could catch this ceremony on live video on Facebook. Why not Zoom, you may ask. I’ll tell you in part 2 of this item. That is, see next item.
- While the commitment ceremony was so beautiful, I wanted it to be a safe space for all to congratulate and wish us well, no trolls allowed, no Bills or Weses and crazies who would say that “You have a sick wife in your hands.” Not that my old friend’s godmother in law wasn’t correct about his divorce and I did advise my old friend Michael to let his wife Amy go because she could not communicate, could not do the things needed for a wife to be. Well, if I had to, I had to tell the truth. I wanted to make sure that nobody shared the link to our ceremony to the wrong people, so I blocked the bad guys on Facebook, blocked them on Twitter, and made our ceremony a hybrid so that Jenny could light the chalice at our apartment and do the spiritual part of things properly. That and I wanted the guests to feel like they could be safe, and nobody would have to mute since I didn’t allow guests in that video. Above all, safety was the number one priority for the ceremony. I had one friend who doubted we’d stay together, doubted marriage altogether but we’re still going and that’s what’s right about the year. When we finished our ceremony, Trenton had a ring on his hand, I am currently wearing both my rings. I am typing this at my desk on the Mac, and I love the mac, but Trenton’s resolution is that he’s getting his self a Mac Mini. I hope that the Mac Mini won’t be so bad for either of us. For Trenton, it will be an M1 chip. So what? We played RS Games with my mac, his PC. But still, we have pics of the wedding still. I now made my minister’s favorite pic my wallpaper, watch face, and so much more. Anyway, the big bad thing about this ceremony was that I had to order the dress online, not enough showed up on the video, only 13 out of 23 interested bothered to show up, and most of those were Colorado locals. So we’re not going to invite more than three quarters of the blind community in Colorado because they didn’t bother to invite me. Not anywhere, but they did leave a bad mark and impression on me. I’m not saying every single person here is guilty, but there are people who can’t be part of my life because they committed vile acts against me I can’t deal with anymore.
- In december of this year, we celebrated not only our commitment last month, but we know that Joe Biden was elected President of the United States of America. Thank you to JUC’s people for taking me and Trenton out voting, and we stole a moment to pose for a picture with our voting stickers on. It was liberating to see the election results, on top of that our wedding/commitment ceremony was held the very same day. We had a bunch to celebrate.
Now, I want to talk about my New Year’s resolutions.
- First and foremost, I’m going to repair the damage that was done to me after the guardianship was held for fifteen years and about eleven months or so. It was discharged in December of this year, I’m reckoning.
- I will be losing weight, and doing fitness stuff. I want to try Apple Fitness Plus because yeah, the workouts are awesome, but I hope they work especially the high intensity trainings. I need those.
- I will also free Britney Spears singlehandedly if I must, so yeah.
- I will use the majority of my time advocating for all disabled adults to be free of damaging guardianships and bondage which can be compared to slavery. I’ll be around for the end of that practice, and I hope it becomes illegal by the end of this year coming up.
- No more corona virus, please, I want to get vaccinated.
Thank you all for reading this.
Happy new year.
It makes me wonder if our nativity scenes are even accurate, but I knew Jesus could not possibly have been born in Bethlehem, but has anyone asked to question Mary’s or … her peasant name was Marium, but her virginity. She could have, according to some finds, been raped by a Roman soldier because of the law of Rome back in the day. No surprises. But the virginity of Mary was mentioned because of the laws against maidens who were to be married at the time. Read the below story though and prepare to have your brain tangled up with questions.