The Mystery of the Name that Nobody Likes

So readers, be warned. If any of you wants to call me names on the Internet or in a physically centered arena, read this. This will engage you in a different way.
So Kahili and I were sitting there talking to a dude called Erik Heil, and he alerted us kindly to the presence of someone who called me the “denver cunt.” First of all, the word “cunt.” Let’s reclaim that word. It’s about a woman’s vagina, okay? I’m not going to put up with women called cunts, but whoever called me a cunt on the Internet certainly is a cunt themselves. Sadly, I don’t have room for a suspect list. The list is rather short: it could be the following people from outside the U.S., where this word is often used.
Shawn Edwards from New Zealand might have done this on account I would not go out with him. IS that the way to behave, young man?
Someone called Mabelin Ramirez might be doing this on account that I’ve blocked her a few times, and she probably engages with Shawn.
Chris West, though highly unlikely, could have used this word against me on account of the history in 2009 and continued weirdness.
Who else? I do believe Shawn Edwards could probably be at the top of my list. Heil informed us that anyone could’ve been calling me a cunt. Let’s just say that if any of you guys have called me a cunt, you all owe me an apology. I don’t think it was West, I do believe it was/is Edwards and Ramirez. Could have also been members of Nick Vogt’s group chat, but not Vogt himself. Robin had a chat, but then I don’t know for sure. Jason Milyo might have been privy to this crap. Now, if you had called me Cunt, fess up, you hoodlums. If you are caught calling me degrading words like that again, you all will pay the piper. I mean it, not a threat, but a promise. You are probably a very disenfranchised disabled man who probably wants me this badly, but you should congratulate Kahili on having me. He’s the best so far. The best boyfriends aren’t just had, they’re made.

Blatant Refusal to Help Us Because of Sin and Religious Motives: A Plea for Action and True Analysis of Charity

Dear Readers,
Upon speaking to an aforementioned friend named Britney M. (name has been changed to protect privacy) I was not believing what I was hearing. All she said when I asked about our moving issue is that she would not help move me in with a man who was not my legal husband. I have written excessively I’m sure about the reasons why to this present day, marriage is impossible and fleeting for me and Kahili. We’re facing not only blatant humiliation and sin stuff attacks and Kahili is literally being humiliated or feels attacked, but we’re blatantly denied the desperate help we need with the move to our new unit. We must receive this help because we don’t have all the arms and legs in the world to move a huge ass queen sized bed, a piano, dining utensils, etc., and moving has always been scary. But we really need to make for darn sure we can move things at all. We cannot move the bed and the piano and the dining set on our own at all. Us both being blind, it could be hard to do this. Kahili’s mild muscular issues due to CP that is milder than one thinks is going to make it almost impossible for him to balance ultraheavy items, and I can’t do it alone. We’re working to find a moving method, but we cannot pay because of the amount of money in SSI we both lack or earn. Trust me, SSI is not a working income an we will not use it forever. But career aspirations have always been bottom dreg jobs that nobody wants, and we disabled adults could get paid less just for benefits’ sake. Do we really want in kind or cash benefits? Kahili and I are not necessarily asking for tin cups. We just want dignity. And if anyone thinks we are doing it with tin cups, so be it. Of course, we could try the begging thing, but trust me I hate begging. We hate sitting out there just to beg for moving expenses, I know how it is. Bucket drops are a form of thievery and beggary when it came to fundraising. We don’t have anyone donating to our GoFundMe campaign. It’s always dangerous in everybody’s eyes to even consider a GoFundMe page. Maybe if we do it right, it would be great. But yeah. Kahili and I also must obtain technology so we can read our mail, and yet Britney said we did not “need” the technology but what did we have for a different choice? Somebody reading our sensitive materials, especially in the situation we’re in, is not a choice. I would never even trust Amadi, the lady we all suspect has committed some form of fraud and wishes to do so, to read our mail because she might not do it right. We cannot allow her to touch SSI info or benefits related information. We cannot allow her to see bank info. We must never allow her to even so much as retrieve orders we’ve put in. Kahili and I need the technology so we can read it like a sighted person, independently and by ourselves. We’ve tried all options, but we’re stuck. NFC tags on the Nexus or Samsung phones will ultimately have a better impact on how we read labels and instructions on cans and boxes. We will also be able to take good pictures if we so desired. We will also use KNFB Reader Mobile so we can read full docs, and with Google Documents on both phones we could share the docs we read with each other’s phones. Kahili for instance could save a benefits related note or letter to his private folders, and he could go back to it later. Once we add all documents we scan via our cells, we’ll have a good record of stuff even on computers. Kahili’s greatest wish now is to purchase a ChromeBook for me because he thinks it’s awesome. What ever.
I don’t mind, but he needs a 4 gb of ram ChromeBook. He wants it that bad. We could use more ram storage anyway so we can get records of documents and keep them in personal folders. But alas, we’re blatantly denied help with moving and becoming independent together. All because of stupid religious motives. I will not necessarily decry Christianity as a bad thing, we’re both Christian, but we’re both aware of the country’s financial imposition of dependence on sighted and able adults. For Kahili and the situation surrounding his being kicked from his mother’s home, he believes it’s too late for any such thing as a peaceful return.
His mother made a bed by kicking him out of the house, so she will lay in it, she will not get his check. Period.
Think about what poverty does to you who are sighted and reading this blog. You have to choose between food and car payments, and oftentimes food comes SECOND to the car payments, but when you are a single mother with five children, that is not an option. Not feeding oneself or children is the price of poverty, and trust me, I’ve been there. Feeding a body that will only live twice or so is the better option. Let’s just say Kahili and I will never worry much about cars. Cars suck anyway.
So here’s the deal: Kahili is desperate to be the man he wants to be. Poverty in the extreme is causing no harm to us directly, but it cannot happen forever. We are blatantly discriminated for the purpose of forced separation. We’re not being sinful and we’ll never discuss your or our sexual info here on WordPress, but we ask kindly that if you are in Denver and reading this, please help. Please put your beliefs and feelings aside and help us get this darn thing out of the house. We need furnishings moved. Big time.
Now, Kahili sits sweetly on the big queen sized bed, staring at me and his cool voice echoes through my mind. He has a strong but gentle pair of hands that are always there to either write something down or give me a pat on the shoulder if I need it. Can’t beat that. But blatant refusal to even assist us in getting the tools to marry due to sinful motives in the eyes of the church is something we will not put up with.

Financial Exploitation of the Disabled Children and Adults: Why the Payee Program Involving Families Needs a Makeover

12-year-old Eva is blind, all from a birth defect caused by her mother’s illness classified as measles. Eva is entitled to a full amount of benefits as denoted by a family with low income. Eva wants to be able to talk to friends online, write papers for school, and later on, she wants a guide dog. Her parents show her the values of coins, and later on, they discuss a budget with her. At sixteen, Eva says she wants to go on a girls’ night with friends. Her parents, mainly her father, who is the representative payee on her SSI check, puts aside $300 for Eva so she can both pay for some community college courses and buy what she wants or needs.
22-year-old Nicholas has mild cerebral palsy (CP), is blind, and is frequently slow at doing stuff. Nicholas’s mother is the payee for his full amount of SSI, yet she fails to keep record of how she’s using the check. Nicholas is certain that the parent in this case, mainly the mother, has been using the check to buy pills such as X and sometimes heroin. Nicholas wants to attend college, but his mother, after being questioned by police, lied about Nicholas’s cognitive abilities, something he never had. His speech is almost slurry and hard to discern due to CP, and being blind, he needs the use of a typing mechanism such as a computer, but his mother would rather he stay with her so she can continue her drug addiction. Something is clearly wrong.
30-year-old Ashley is cognitively impaired, so she is unaware of what her mother has done to her. She has a full amount of SSI, but her family continuously sexually abuses her. While they are supposedly using the check for Ashley’s “needs”, they are really buying wants with it. The wants are for themselves. The family have become Ashley’s guardians, have stolen the check from her from year to year since her eighteenth birthday. In spite of cognitive impairment, Ashley wants a small job as a horse groomer. She longs to leave the family, but they continue to threaten and abuse her. Worse, they have been busted for identity theft in the first degree.
What do these vignettes have in common?
All of them have something to do with the disabled being financially exploited or the money is managed at some level. We meet Eva at the beginning of this post. Eva’s mom is responsible and so is her dad. It is every parent’s duty, whether your child is disabled or not, to allow the child to learn how to manage their own money and affairs. Guardianship should never justify the other two scenarios. How many of you disabled people can relate to the other two vignettes? I’m sure some of you advocates see a lot of Ashleys out there. Nicholas is most like my dear Kahili, who recently received a call from his grandmother, Kayla (name has been changed to protect privacy.) Kahili’s grandmother tried to guilt trip Kahili into letting Amadi keep his check. His own mother does not have any clue that the check is his upon his eighteenth birthday.
So what is the role of a payee? A payee is someone who benefits the beneficiary. Well, Amadi is not doing much benefiting if she keeps the check even after he reports moving to his girlfriend’s address. Stupid as it is, the girlfriend is helping him out. The girlfriend’s bank account is empty. That girlfriend is me.
So what has this unfair system of manipulation done to him? Kahili faces a tough battle, but I’m willing to advocate for him. I’m advocating for a total makeover to the way people handle the duties associated with a payee.
First, let’s look at the duties of a payee. According to the Social Security Administration, one must have a cognitive disability or inability to manage money. Personally, I’m bad with math, but if given a bit of guidance, I can get the right numbers. Sadly, I had to report Kahili as a member of my household on the Colorado Peak website, which by the way, for you Denver folks, it’s accessible as hell. It’s amazing, just pick the correct check marks. That’s all. Kahili and I will likely share food stamps. Who cares if I lose or gain, so long as Kahili and I are able to eat. We have to eat, just eat our food and eat we will. I’m also advocating possibly for Kayla to get some help because she’s been diagnosed with dementia and is easily swayed and manipulated. I should have easily spotted that, but I eventually did. I tried it all, tried saying that it’s not about the mom anymore.
Sadly, this scenario plays out with families all over the nation. With our economy going down, we are pulling the most vulnerable persons into economic slavery. With Kahili’s situation, there is too much strife as done by his mother. The mother will likely go homeless, but oh well, you know one might say that karma’s a bitch. Karma is a real bitch. There’s an old phrase, it’s your bed, you lay in it. We, meaning Kahili and I, will likely have to charge Amadi with social security fraud or warn her that she can no longer receive the check. In that case, if she does, she will be charged by the Feds or the State with social security fraud. What worries me is that she might go further and steal someone’s credit card, and that’s how desperate she is. She could swipe my card, so Kahili and I planned some things out, and we agreed not to let her touch any financial stuff, including bank records or bank statements. She is not allowed to help Kahili or myself with bank crap. She cannot have my banknote identifier, my pride and joy honestly when it comes to managing the value of U.S. currency. Kahili will sign up for a bank identifier. When that is done, we will keep a safe in our living room. I have two locker locks, including a gun lock. Don’t ask me how, but I signed a gun safety pledge just to get that free lock. Anything for free stuff, right?
So Kahili and I will also be taking other safety precautions. With Amadi in the house, we will not be reciting credit card info or allowing any bank site to be in view of her. All bank notes and cards will be stowed away so she can’t get to them. Each of us will have a key hidden somewhere in a panty drawer or something.
Disabled people are often unaware that they’re being used as ATM cards to give parents the upper hand and pay for the parents’ wants. This must stop. How can we do this ourselves?
1. We must approach this as a crime. Any parent who wrongfully and willfully exploits a disabled person based upon a perceived lack of capacity to manage money should be charged with SSI social security fraud and identity theft first degree. They must spend a year or more depending on the class and degree of the crime committed. Amadi should never get away with this.
2. The persons in this case should never be allowed to be payees for adults with disabilities.
3. Treat your children just like any other child, and give them the tools and skills of blindness for God’s sake, not the rigors of being sheltered.
4. Do not exploit your child’s disability for your personal gain. No way no how.

Social Security is Social Indignity for the Physically Handicapped and Disabled Americans

Dear Readers,
Kahili and I are having problems a lot with people not supporting us. We’re also not surprised by the U.S. government supporting more money for the church’s so called sinful relationships outside the context of marriage. I’m sorry, but I cannot fathom what God had in mind for Kahili and I. But the convictions as stated by John Divine, one of the Pastoral staff at Grace Community Church (name has been changed to protect privacy) was that I could not live with Kahili. But his mother, Amadi, (name has been changed to protect privacy), decided to throw him out. In my view, she forced a rush in our relations. Kahili and I are both aware of one looming penalty, however.
We realize that SSI checks aren’t everything. We want to earn. And work. However, Kahili and I need an opportunity to put our good work ethic on. What we see in the disabled community bothers me most.
Amadi is a data entry clerk with temporary career prospects popping up right and left, but Kahili does not have that opportunity and nor do I. We both face a 70% likelihood of lifetime rejection and unemployment. What churches don’t realize is that it may “cost” to be a “Disciple of Christ”, but what Christ they worship isn’t the true Christ in the Bible.
Jesus in the Bible forgave sinners, not convicted them necessarily. My friend Britney (name has been changed to protect privacy) has told me that even in the beginning of our friendship, she cared about me. Honestly, Britney is stating a big box of bullshit about something that a lot of others do. The churchpeople I have seen for the past few years are too perfect, both in body and in some soul aspects. I’m not worthy of Baptism according to them, and Kahili gets stoned for even making a home with me, and outside the context of marriage. When I marry him, he is going to lose some and so will I. Deemed spousal income is hard to calculate. But we need all the support we can get.
We ask that you readers consider this as a rhetorical, thought-provoking question. What if we GAVE to disabled couples who truly wanted to be together? We should reward the blind couple who’s been told they can never marry, but they do it anyway. We should celebrate marriage, a covenant with God that never should end. We should celebrate love, not sex and the girl’s pussy meeting boy’s dick in song and story. We should ring the bells, sound the pipes and drums of wedding regalia. We should always be festive when a real wedding is held. We should give more money of course because children cost and we know it.
So you might be asking, but Beth, your Highness, your Royal Majesty, what on Earth is the benefit? Well, think about it. Children in poverty are not given opportunities to learn a trade or special skill. Kahili and I would pay handsomely for our baby’s formula, then move on to pay for something a child likes. Our daughter or son would be able to know how to play the piano, and we’d pay for professional lesson at a discounted cost if possible. Kahili’s daughter or son would also be able to get a sportsman uniform at a low cost if we were given a “marriage grant” as it were. I would have an application process, and it would vary from family to family who gets what.
For instance, a blind couple in their twenties would get free parenting classes, $4000 per month to get a house and we’d have to give said blind couple free access to a loan or the opportunity to sign up for a home equity loan so they can get a down payment on a comfortable home. This would decrease the chances of the children of said couple being taken away from the parents, and if we as a country truly care about our children, we need to keep the strongest families together. I bet you buttheads in the church who think I’m not capable of bringing a child into the world that yes, I can raise a Midori or Einstein or Leonard Bernstein. Do you bastards get it? I”m talking to the dirty politicians in Washington who are sitting pretty in a mansion and not thinking that we blind couples wanting marriage are stoned, judged, and hurt. We’re at the bottom of the bottom of the pot of your stupid little lives. So here’s what else we should do: add about a couple thousand bucks per child born. The initial $4000 marriage grant would get a blind couple out of the badly in need of HUD category, and put us in the good stuff. Children will need a comfortable and safe place to play and run. I would smile happily as Kahili and I sit by and watch the kids (prospective ones mind you) play around in the backyard. We’d have them a dog, a golden one with a big fluffy tail. How many disabled adults are actually thinking carefully about what should be done?
It’s not that the blind are owed things, but we need safer and better housing. One of my greatest friends, a guy named Ben Reed (name has been changed), was recently forced to sign away his five or so children by a previous wife. Reed told me he had no choice because of social services taking away his family. He can’t even leave his home state. I’m upset that anyone would do something to any blind father. Reed’s home state abused their powers to abuse him and say, “We’ve got the kids.” This is also a common abuse tactic with disabled divorcees and I’m not one to leave Kahili.
Readers, I’m sorry I went off on a rage, but please take what I say into consideration. A marriage “grant” instead of the current penalty would make children safer, the disabled become better parents, and would allow the church to stop judging us so much.
Thank you all.
From Beth and Kahili

Who is God?

So readers, if you’re a churchgoing person, read carefully. If you’re blind, read carefully. If you have SSI and have a relationship you wish to fulfill, read even more carefully. If you’re all three of those things, then read on.
I got back from Grace Community Church, where I spoke to associate pastors about what was up. I was told not to do Behold Our God devo groups. Fine, fine and dandy. But then what? Sadly, my boyfriend, Kahili, had an empathic attack when we got back to my place. He literally balled his eyes out, and rivers of salty tears poured out. The church pastors tried to reason with me about the not living with the boyfriend scenario. But again, since guardianship has damaged any and all opportunity to marry and live a regular mundane life at all, I’m seriously trying to shut them up. If they poke and pry, I’ll just have to say no. Of course, we have decided as a couple that this church may find itself not in line with the philosophy of helping others. With a complicated membership system, the church is asking that you fill out a multipage application to be a member. You must attend Gospel Centered Life Care Groups, and all that, only to find that you have to even meet with the pastor or the pastor and his wife. Then, you must take a Focus seminar. This church seriously does not believe in accepting gays and lesbians, does not even know where to start with acceptance of disabled people. Yes, I have two blind friends at this church, but there’s a problem. If Kahili wasn’t with me at the moment, he’d be sucked dry each month and not able to date me at all. We’re seriously going to leave it up to the both of us, and I say this church may be wrong. For one, the new associate pastor just added to this church’s staff said that there is a conviction that Kahili and I should not live together. Sadly, we are not going to line up with folks who do the foolish thing of thinking that we disabled adults must remain pure and dependent. I’d rather be impure and independent. That’s all. I’d rather we be able to do what we wish, take risks in life, then have to hurt even further. Kahili and I love each other to death, but we do see a need for counseling. The only thing is that counseling may cost us. So what if being a disciple of Christ costs? Well, it’ll cost me all the things a mundane Christian life entails. What is the trade off and opportunity cost? Let’s see, the trade off is don’t live with Kahili and risk being alone and attacked mentally, not have someone to hold me or talk with me during a real crisis. As a mental health system is failing all over the nation, I can’t afford to lose my sanity. The biggest cost would be ever knowing Kahili again. The cost of staying a member of this church is clear: I will be judged, Kahili will have more empathic attacks. God is watching us from a distance as Bet Middler would sing. However, my kind of God is this one:
God in my view is someone who doesn’t give a hoot about politics. Obviously, you shouldn’t do things wrong. God has a moral guiding light around him, something that not all things have. The one true Yahweh who led the Israelites from Egypt is indeed a jealous God who never gives up. But there’s something clear about the God I speak of: Yahweh knows my heart and knows what crises I’ve been through. I’ve been through enough crap. Kahili is the one I want to live with because God knows the irate females I’ve dealt with are no good. Too many females I’ve lived with up and left. I’m done. Done.
Who is the God that this church worships? Well, all of the things I spoke of are correct, except that their God is the God of dependence and purity, self loathing, absolute obedience. I will never hear of this God nor can I. Yes, there’s a certain level of obedience to God I can take. But due to mental health triggers and emotional issues regarding how I am to live my life, I’m as of right now taking the church to some level of accountability. This church, a church I valued for so long, a source of friendships and fellowships and all that, is not the church I wish to attend any longer than I should. This church endorses Republican politics which, given my circumstances, is disrespectful and offensive to the disabled community. My Kahili and I are both blind and Kahili has mild CP in his legs, one being shorter than the other. His balance, therefore is weird. He also may veer into oncoming traffic. No church will accept a blind and mentally ill or blind and physically ailing couple. We’re in a rock and a hard place. However, the pastoral staff at the Sovereign Grace church I attended for a while actually won’t listen. They’ll never even look at Kahili’s face when they even see what is happening. I’ll have to explain his empathic attack he had was a direct result of how not only I was feeling offended by that verse in Proverbs but also the way the judgment went down. God doesn’t care as much about the disabled in their minds, but as a disabled woman, I am not able to obtain friends. I’ve been pained and shamed one too many times. God is love, and all who live in love live in God. Caring for someone should never result in an empathic attack like that exhibited by Kahili. He was literally balling so hard. He ran right into my garbage can. We’re seriously going to need to rethink the whole Baptism thing, and I may have to be Baptized somewhere else. We’re both concerned about checking out other churches for fear of unaccepting people. First Mennonite church is the only one close here. So we were also thinking Christ Our Redeemer African Methodist Episcopal church. Kahili played drums at a former congregation in a Denver AME church before. So I wanted to go with what we could do. The problem with a lot of these Christian assemblies is that they don’t approve of living with a significant other, and in our case, it’s a lot more complicated.
We beg you, Denver based readers and others, to please consider coming and helping us out. Kahili and his empathic attacks are a clear sign that I can’t leave him alone. I still think church would be a great option to meet others in the community of Denver itself, but I don’t think there could be any closer churches than Grace that will accept a blind person. Selena is a friend who attends the church. I may simply have to explain. She may have to speak on my behalf to the pastoral staff and explain that the empathic attacks are important signs to check out. Kahili’s symptoms of emotional empathy are not bad things, but they are good signs that he can be deeply connected to someone. Right now, he lies asleep in my bed. I live currently in a studio, about to upgrade two times over to a two bedroom. So there you go.
Anyhow, the God these evangelical churches believe in is a God that does not care about rape survivors, rape victims, and teenagers molested by their families. Babies come first. Not even the mothers’ bodies are valued. Kahili values my body as anything else. I plan to get birth control so we don’t conceive early on in the relationship. We want to do the responsible thing and go for it. Kahili’s mom is also willing to pop over to Old Chicago to hang with us. Anyhow, the other things wrong with evangelical version of Yahweh include the stealing of disabled adults’ finances when married, unaccepting the disabled adult’s desire not to live in a bad part of the city, not realizing that guardianship is antiquated. Since when did I need that? You all are lucky I blocked some folks on Facebook, that is for sure.
Readers, if you have any comments, please feel free to comment. We’d like to thank Frijolic14 for commenting diligently on later posts.

So Is Living with a Significant Other Before Marriage Really a Sin?

Dear Readers,
Recently, I was bashed and supported, loved and hated, rocked with the possibility of living with my boyfriend, Kahili. We wanted to wait six months, but his mom threw him out, so we decided well, it’s her bed, she should lie in it. So Kahili is here now, and we’re looking forward to the new place. We’re literally in overdrive and excitement is building as far as what budget we should put together, painting a picture of our place. Kahili and I both have ideas about what the place would look like, what we’d do, but there are some people who just don’t think we should live together because, being the ultraconservative Christian folks they are, they believe we will have babies outside of marriage. Well? Kahili and myself are both the following: unemployed, blind, and on disability. We are both aware of the combined income and budget issues. We’re both very aware of a lot of things, including that my parents have stolen marriage from me so they could have guardianship. Their so called permanent guardianship has made all dating and living arrangements a so called sin, and … well, Kahili doesn’t feel that this is right nor proper.
Let’s be clear: Bible stories are great teaching tools. However, there is no justification for bashing folks who live together outside marriage. Let’s also make another thing clear: because of our disability, blindness, and other associated disabilities such as a mild case of cerebral palsy and for me, mild mental trauma disorders and border line personality, we cannot just wait a year or two and go buy a house or public housing or just go get a market based apartment. We just can’t. Given our checks, we also needed time, but thank God the two bed came up for us, so we’ll get it. However, Kahili’s mom used his check for her, almost all of it going to one big bill. I don’t think that’s right, and neither should anyone else justify this.
What’s sad is that my whole family thinks he should stay with his mother. Well? Respect or otherwise, the disabled community has a solid and God given right to make choices, and the Biblical standard for making choices has been totally steered the wrong way. Let’s talk about the Bible and its views and why it’s absolutely not in line with God’s true word to tell others what to do with their lives.
First and foremost, remember that women in Biblical days were promised, not just married, but promised to men who were ten times older than they were. Mary was given to Joseph in a pledge when they were kiddos, about eight years old. Well, Mary had to go through with a ceremony at fifteen or so and maybe even younger. Pure young maidens were married off at such a young and pliant age that they knew nothing. That was the rule in ancient times. What’s obvious about the Bible’s female characters is that none were blind and none possessed talents or skills like music and or poetry. Men and women who were blind were bashed and criticized in the early church because they were feared, and blindness was considered contagious. Very contagious diseases could cause blindness.
Blind people were considered indigent and still are in most places. How do you expect a blind person to marry, one might ask. No maiden in the Bible’s stories’ time frames were ever married. No young maiden of blind kind could ever be allowed to take part in household and social life. Think about it. We’re not justifying any bad things, but look at where the reasoning for bashing and nonsupport comes from. There is no justification for telling blind folks what to do. Kahili and I are excited about the new place. I plan to do responsible things, things like the use of birth control and no, not an IUD. I’m not getting surgery to prevent pregnancy. Kahili and I eventually do want to marry, but true legal marriage is closed to me because my parents are as stupid as play dough and they’ve obtained the guardianship for their own personal gain. My parents, shockingly enough, have not filed paperwork in four years. Of course, they won’t surrender peacefully. They want to hold on, smother, protect. But that’s not stopping Kahili from wanting to marry me. We’ve even talked about common law marriage, and it seems that is the only way we can go for now since the way the government views us is stupid. We lose income for legal marriage.
We believe the government should increase, not decrease, income for legal marriages involving two parties with disabilities. We would qualify for better housing so the kids can grow up safely. At least we live like right by a school. However, we really need to be able to save up for furnishings. With a legal marriage, it becomes a barrier for us. This is ridiculous. A penalty for being married is unacceptable. Why not reform disability pensions so that all pensioners like that in Australia and the United States do not lose one penny even after they get married. Let’s make legal marriage more acceptable, but also more rewarding. Living in a state of so called sin is not sin at all provided there is the circumstances listed here. Thank you all for your reading and consideration.

Moving to a New Place, New Chapter, No Way!

Hello, readers. It has become apparent that my little shack is about to get waaaaaaay bigger. Altogether, I’m pleased with myself. My boyfriend … yes, I got a new one, he and I decided on a whim because of his mother throwing him out of her abode, we’re moving into a two bedroom that became available and I’ll be so happy. My boyfriend, a young man who is African American and plays a drum, yes, he’s a drummer, is probably the best I’ve ever had. We swore we wouldn’t leave each other. So we decided to take the two bedroom. Kahili is a real cute thing with the hottest looking feet in the world. He’s a total sweetheart. For the sake of blogging, I won’t reveal Kahili’s identity here. But some of you may know him as a native of Denver, and he and I have totally gotten together and bonded pretty quickly. Yes, it might have been too early to move in, but think about it. His mother is simply going to have to let go. This isn’t so much about exploitation of disabled adults, but the woman in question should know that Kahili wants to be with me, live on his own, be a man for a change. We will be talking with the mother very soon on Sunday. We would love to do this as it would be great and awesome. Maybe the two can make peace. At least enough so she understands that when you make such a grave choice and throw a man out of the house, you get what you get. At least the law doesn’t have to be involved. We were both worried about small claims and other stuff, but if the lady cooperates with us, we’ll have some to pay off my bills. I’ve literally drained my bank account trying to make it so we can be fed. Some foods we could not obtain due to lack of transport to the store and lack of assistance finding foods in the store. We also needed help with laundering but food and laundry matting were in conflict. Luckily, the mother was asked to bring the drum case. I was worried I’d have to bring a drum case or buy one. But now, my bank is drained. Drained to the point of insufficient funds. It just keeps bouncing. And with a man like Kahili to support me, it’ll be wonderful. We can at least have more headspace in the budget.