A Letter To Jessica

Dear Jessica Grabowski,
You might think what you’re doing is justifiable, but here’s what’s wrong with it. I’m not one to let Nick sit there and rot away in a group home that makes every attempt to keep him hidden away from society. What’s this? A prison? Jessica, you have a group home, too. So you are doing the wrong thing. You accuse me of hate speech, but if anyone’s going to starve or emotionally abuse or hide away any of my friends or justify a kidnapping charge, that person will be called out. People like this should be publicly humiliated. Jessica, do you realize that you will share details with me and Blake, you will apologize with Blake, and you will have to stand before your Creator and confess to doing this evil deed of deletions and misguided attempts to not be friends with me or Blake? Mabelin said the same thing. So why are you doing this? Jessica W. Grabowski, give me back all the things you think you can take. Blake has been through hell with me, and we will be married regardless of benefits being decreased. Medicaid needs to be increased, rather. That includes maternity insurance and other things that Blake and the kids will need. We may not likely get a job, and yes, we want steak and seafood, and we must have a wedding by God’s command. Jessica, by the laws of God, your wedding wasn’t even legalized or finalized due to Medicaid. You put Medicaid and stuff above your marriage and that is definitely not right, but that doesn’t stop me from saying you can change this. We as a disabled community face a lot of challenges as people with so called disabilities. For you, Jessica, someone could beat you, starve you, etc. I will be good and happy to expose the con artistry of people like the ones you could encounter who will beat and starve you and abuse you. Jess, if it means I have to put a nanny cam in your room, that’s what I’m gonna do. I will never see the footage edited, but if the footage suggests abuse, I will put it up on YouTube so that people see the disgusting habits of people in group homes. With the exception of Bryan your husband’s visits, something else needs to be done about the way you treat others and when they treat you bad. I would never have exposed Nick’s staff if they hadn’t kept on bullying and forcing him to do things. I was upset today because you refuse to hear me out. Now, Jess, here are your marching orders:
1. You need to stop acting like you’re five, you are in your thirties. Add me back to Skype and FB. Stop it with your putting walls around yourself. Your Creator is watching every move you make, and it’s not something I say to scare you, but it is the god honest truth.
2. Confess to both of us and to Jesus Christ your Lord that you have disobeyed and dishonored him by putting Caesar before God. I don’t pay taxes to a government who doesn’t want disabled or welfare recipients to marry. I’m not saying necessarily that I won’t, but if I had the choice not to, I wouldn’t enrich people who treat me like garbage. So, Jessica, when I say Caesar, I say the government that is like that of Ancient Rome. Stop supporting said government and marry Bryan for real. You had the ceremony, but you need to legally bind yourself and forget about Medicaid. Fight for a change in the law so you can have benefits, barrier free housing, and yes, your husband can provide you an aid. My friend Caitlin can do this.
So why don’t you?
3. When you go to Heaven, or if St. Peter greets you at the Pearly Gates, you will need to do the following: state your first, middle and last names. Tell St. Peter you did what you did to me, and put your support of a Romanesque government on the top of your list. Jess, Blake and I will marry regardless of the law. The only law I obey that is more important is that of God and Christ. They come first. Country comes at a second place. My country must obey God’s law, and yes, allow disabled people to immigrate to this place and marry. We need to encourage marriage of disabled people. This may sound radical, but we also need to give welfare recipients time to go out and shop at malls. That’s where the wedding bands are purchased. Aleeha Dudley is a good friend, and yes, she made a good point. Marriage decreases benefits, and detrimentally. We will not, however, live together as companions or something less than because of a Romanesque and selfish brat called government. I’m not antigovernment in the least, but Jessica and others like her need to be recognized as people, not social security numbers. Jessica, as I address you firmly and stiffly while writing this, you will do as I say or face imminent removal from all the people that I speak with. You made me cry so damn hard that I wish Blake were there to tell me what you did was wrong. You will be held responsible for your actions by your Creator unless you accept Jesus. As a Christian, I see this as possible, but stop it with the walls, stop it with your five-year-old mentality. This is a huge problem in the community. People like my friends Ashley and Silvia are doing good things to stop gossip and drama, but there are those like Jessica and Mabelin who aren’t. Jessica, I see more potential with you because you were friends with me, you were loving and kind toward Blake. Why you treated us like shit I will never know. If you don’t come back to me and apologize and abolish this heinous treatment of your fellow disabled community members, you will face a certainly cruel life and I won’t be there to save you. Jess, disabled adults like us are vulnerable. I’m confessing now. Disabled adults are all vulnerable due to their challenges in life. We face con artists, bad landlords, bad group home situations like Nick’s, and yes, neglect, beatings, starvings, etc. We also have all the stuff from our lives bothering us. Our treatment runs the gamut of pampering for charity purposes and because we feel we must to flat out violent abuse because we hate our disabled son/daughter. Jessica, I know you’ve been through hell, but now is not the time to get revenge for your violent boyfriends/father and so on on me. Come back, and stop it. You have a choice: come back and stop it or continue lying about me and risk me telling the world you are a hateful individual who does not care about people like yourself. Jessica, my friend Caitlin could easily die if she doesn’t get an aid to care for her and cook for her while Mom is gone. Mike, her dear husband, is out working half the time. Caitlin is a sweetheart. I love her very much, and you don’t know the half of it. Jason Owens tried to date her, and Caitlin and I remembered this. Unless you truly are a Jason Owens, get your head out of your butt and come back. Just crawl back to me and think about what you did. If I were your mother, I would have locked you up with no food for two hours or no communication with the outside world for two freaking hours so that you would know how it felt like to be me. I wish I could break your heart. I wish I could make you cry. I wish I could finally teach you a lesson about being alone in the dark. But you know, I wouldn’t hurt a fly. Some people however do not learn well, and you need to be taught a harsh lesson about what it was like to be me in the early days of my life. You need to witness bullying repeatedly, head rocking fixations by family and teachers, and flat out refusals to take services that were good. Flat out refusals by potential dating partners were also a hallmark of my whole life. I have been in love a million times it seems and all the times I’ve been in love, they’ve all said, “No.” I want a baby one day, but I’m afraid that the disabled attitude of society will mean the baby will get taken away from Blake and me. We need to educate and possibly move the baby. I will not risk a kidnapping charge. I am really worried. Honestly, Nick needs to be able to choose what happens to him. If Nick were any more disabled, he would be starved to death, beaten, sexually abused. I will not have this happen to someone who is able to exhibit his personality or even worse, could be helpless if someone had that choice to do this to him. Nick’s guardians could sexually exploit him because they are his guardians. My parents got this as a means of power and control. I must have the power to buck the system so that the power and control my parents have will subside. In my forensic evaluation, I answered all the questions I could in the Minnesota Multi Personality Inventory. The MMPI was invalid at 17 so I took it seriously. I had to respond to all the questions, and there were criminal related questions. I admit all the criminal questions were false. I don’t enjoy hurting people. In fact, if anyone enjoyed hurting those people, they really should get themselves hurt so much worse than this. Jessica, you need to confess you enjoy hurting me and Blake, and that you have a vendetta against us. We’re sick of people treating us like shit. We want you in the thinking chair and thinking about what you did wrong, and you must pray that you can shut up and realize your vulnerability. We depend on the Savior, the God who made us. Yes, if you just ask Christ into your life, you could get all your sins wiped out. And yes, I forgive you for all this, but you need to give it a chance and forgive yourself. Enough is enough. I’m calling you out on my blog because you don’t seem to understand shit. You don’t seem to care that you’re disabled like the rest of the community and you need to see your vulnerability as important. You can’t lie in bed all day anymore. Get up and do something. Let it all go, and come back. Apologize to Blake, and if you refuse, then guess what you will get? Just as a five year old says “no, mommy, I will not give you the toy”, you will get punished for not giving me back my dignity as a thirty something lady. IF my son/daughter were five years old and refused to do as I commanded or asked, I’d put that child down and say, “You won’t get any more toys from me at all.” I will tell my children and those around me, and this is how it will sound: “If you do not share your toys with your siblings, I will not allow you to play outside today.” Simple statement, right? IF you’re a thirties woman and married, you should know this. Right? So let’s try this: “If you do not stop confiding with the Enemy, the staff at the group home, and thinking it’s ok to call me hateful and say I write hate speech on Facebook, if you do not confess to your wrongdoings, I will take all of your contacts away. So be it.” IF you get lonely, so be it. I will even have it so your husband doesn’t even talk to you. He needs to clamp down and lead you in the right direction as Blake has done me. Take it or leave it.
Beth Taurasi

Author: denverqueen

My name is Beth. I'm blind from birth and enjoy the blogging atmosphere. I am a creative person, a musician, a writer, etc. This is me. Take it or leave it.

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